With a range of next-level toys, lacy lingerie pieces, and even an adult advent calendar, Lovehoney is here to help you prioritize your pleasure and sexual happiness. Plus, all of its expert-approved offerings are wrapped in discreet packaging, so the fun stays between you and your partner. Keep scrolling to shop our curation of toys, lingerie, and accessories to reignite your sex life this holiday season.

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We asked 11 real women for their favorite sex moves, then consulted sex experts for their tips on how to upgrade your own go-to moves so they feel new and exciting. In short, it doesn't take a Kama Sutra master to have better sex—it's really about breaking from habit, exploring the unknown, and enhancing what already works.

Teylor, 28, social media manager

Favorite Position: Scissoring with either him on top or me. When I’m on top, I love to push myself down as far as I can and grind on top of him. When he’s on top, I love to grab his arms.

What makes it hot: When I’m on top, I love how he grabs my thighs and when he’s on top, I love when he kisses my feet and I can grab his arms and suck his fingers. Sitting on top of him in a chair is also a very hot bonus!

Fun Props: I’ve actually never used props—besides a shower. I also love when I use my vibrator on myself. I can do it multiple times a day!

Jasmine, 37, writer/designer

Favorite position: I lie on my stomach with my legs slightly spread and he enters me from behind. While thrusting, he grabs my shoulders to go deeper inside, runs his hands down my back, and I brace myself for the ultimate ass grab.

What makes it so hot: I love the feeling of a masculine touch coupled with the jiggling sensation my butt makes. I think it excites my partner that much more when I turn around to look back and show him how much I’m digging what he’s putting down.

Fun prop: Coconut oil—it’s nature’s lubricant. Slip and slide anyone?

Maya, 30, graphic designer

Favorite position: Me on top but bent forward—kind of a combination of missionary and cowgirl.

What makes it so hot: The best part about cowgirl is the stimulation, but it also feels very performative to me sometimes. Leaning forward brings back the intimacy of missionary while still giving me control. It’s also one of the very few ways I’m able to orgasm from sex, so that’s a huge plus.

Fun prop: I’m a big fan of lingerie in general but I’ve been very into the concept of a stretchy lace bodysuit with sleeves. It gives your partner a lot to grab on to, it’s easy to navigate around without taking it off, and the slightly unexpected extra coverage from the sleeves is very sexy.

Julia, 25, writer

Favorite position: My favorite is upright, from behind—think steamy shower, bent over one leg up on the edge of the tub.

What makes it so hot: The running water and upright position make it feel urgent (in a good way), the angle is just right for me, and it's perfect for spontaneous, quick and dirty sex or taking your time (falling into bed for round two afterwards all clean and warm feels great). Also, this position always pulled double-duty for me and my boyfriend when we were long distance. I have many sexy memories of seeing him again after a long separation and immediately hopping in the shower together to wash off the airplane grime and enjoy a sweet reunion.

Fun prop: I love a good unisex shower gel, like Neutrogena Rainbath. It's perfectly musky and great for lathering each other up.

Danielle, 26, photographer

Favorite position: We're in a spooning position, and he moves onto his knees behind me and continues thrusting from there.

What makes it so hot: Other than it making me come almost instantly, it's always a surprising move that helps us branch out from missionary. We often transition to doggy style or cowgirl after that.

Fun prop: A little vibrator like the Dame Fin, otherwise it's hard to reach my clit in this spot (it's usually not needed though).

Ana, 24, publicist

Favorite position: I'm straddling him, reverse-cowgirl style, while he's propped up on his back in the bathtub and I'm bracing myself against the sides or the wall.

What makes it so hot: I love it because I get to take charge and control the angle, and the warm water helps us relax. It's also a nice change of pace from the routine, so usually we'll try it when we're on vacation (since no one actually wants to clean their bathtub at home). The ambience is really sexy since everything's candlelit and the water and soap naturally get everything going down there.

Fun prop: Candles, bubbles, and bath oil. Just make sure you don't slip around too much when you're moving around (and prepare to get your knees a little bruised if you're trying it in a smaller space)!

Maya, 26, executive assistant

Favorite position: We're standing. I face my boyfriend and wrap my legs around his torso. He puts his hands beneath my butt and lifts me up and down while thrusting into me. I call it "The Claw."

What makes it so hot: I'm a very independent woman, but I occasionally love being dominated. My partner is in total control here—I don't have to do a thing! It may be a physically demanding position for him, but it makes me feel virtually weightless—and totally orgasmic.

Fun prop: The Claw is even more fun when you're greased up, so slick yourselves down with Johnson's Baby Oil Gel beforehand. But practice it dry a few times first so you don't get hurt!

Akynos, 24, internet sex columnist/model

Favorite position I'm flat on my back. He slides on top of me and—OK, I admit it! The position that always does it for me is missionary!

What makes it so hot: It may seem like a tame choice for a sex columnist, but I just love looking into a guy's eyes while we're having sex. And it's not like I just lie there—I love to grab his butt and draw him as deeply as I can inside of me so that I can feel every inch of him. I never get bored of climaxing like this. But men, be warned: If your mouth isn't all over my lips and neck, you're wasting my time!

Fun prop: Try a little fresh air! When I was a teenager, I got it on with a guy on a rooftop in our neighborhood. I was so naïve—I didn't think anyone would see us up there. But the news got back to my mother, and all hell broke loose. Still, it's a sexy thing to think back on...and I still love doing it outside.

Majesta, 28, nurse's assistant/nanny

Favorite position: I lie on my back with my legs over my boyfriend's shoulders. He leans forward with his chest resting on the backs of my thighs and plunges in and out of me. I tend to make a lot of noise, so we refer to it as "The Scream Machine."

What makes it so hot: It allows for deeper penetration than almost any other position—and definitely leads to the most intense orgasms.

Fun props: Strawberries, whipped cream, and champagne make for unbelievable foreplay. I suggest a hands-off policy while we eat, which my guy usually agrees to at first. But as he watches me sip champagne and pop cream-covered strawberries into my mouth, he goes crazy. By the time the last strawberry is gone, so are our clothes!

Afinity, 27, administrative coordinator

Favorite position: My fiancé, Allen, and I kneel on the floor with a couch or bed in front of us to brace ourselves. He's behind me, and I spread my legs a little wider than his for balance. He penetrates me from behind. I nicknamed this "The Reverse Allen," because it's a variation on another amazing position he came up with. He's very creative!

What makes it so hot: It makes me feel like the sexiest woman on earth, because it pushes my chest out and pulls my stomach in so my body looks fantastic. And there are endless variations. During one recent quickie, I led Allen's hand to my hair so he could tug on it. It was such a huge turn-on that I climaxed within seconds.

Fun props: I love sliding on stockings and sky-high heels before sex. Nothing looks hotter than when I'm wearing only these.

Rachel, 27, fitness coach

Favorite position: I'm riding him while his legs are draped over the side of the bed and I'm leaning back slightly and arching my back.

What makes it so hot: I feel like a rockstar because my entire body's on display and I'll admit that it's always more engaging for me when I'm making eye contact with my boyfriend. He likes to brace himself against my shoulder or grab my chest when we're in the thick of it.

Fun props: It's pretty simple, but I always go for a really lacy or sheer lingerie set, especially when we start out in this position. He either can't wait to get me out of them or I'll leave the top half rolled down around my waist for some peek-a-boo action.

How to Upgrade Classic Sex Positions

The Kama Sutra contains a nearly exhaustive (literally) selection of positions to choose from, but most of us stick to a few tried-and-true basics, says Tracey Cox, author of The Hot Sex Handbook. Below, she and Shindy Chen, author of erotica novel The First Time, recommend several sex tips for making the same-old routine feel anything but ordinary—especially if you happen to be more of a creature of habit than a sexual adventurer:

Missionary

Cox: Place a pillow underneath your butt. Instead of simply lying back as he thrusts in and out of you, sit up halfway, lift your butt, and then slowly lean backward. Repeat until one of you climaxes.

Chen: For women who find it difficult to reach orgasm in the missionary position, I recommend helping yourself along. Just the visual alone of you touching yourself will be a feast for his eyes. During missionary your partner can leave just enough space in between your bodies so that you can slip your hand in between, reach down, and slowly stroke your own clitoral area (or C-spot) to the rhythm of his strokes, building yourself up to orgasm; with a little bit of practice it's a great way to time reaching your orgasms together.

Woman On Top

Cox: Move your body in small circles as you lift and lower your pelvis. Have him sit up, with his legs straight out in front of him. Lower yourself onto his penis and sit with your knees bent, facing him, with your feet flat on the floor.

Doggie Style

Cox: Rather than kneel, lie facedown on the bed, with your legs spread. He lies on your back and penetrates you from behind. Try having him stand behind you while you gradually—and carefully!—lean forward until your hands touch the floor.

Chen: While on all fours, with your partner behind you, either instruct your partner to reach around, or guide your partner's hand around your hips. With a finger or two begin gently stroking your C-spot while you're being penetrated from behind. Done properly, slowly, and gently, you can build up to an explosive orgasm.

Side-by-Side

Cox: Grind your body against his penis, bending from the waist and moving your upper torso downward. Reach around to fondle him while he's moving in and out of you.

Manual Stimulation

Chen: If you find yourself on top or on bottom and you've got a free hand, slowly and softly grab and rub his balls while you're riding him. Or, if you're on bottom, reach for his balls as he's penetrating you during deeper strokes. Give them a gentle tug and notice his immediate pleasure receptors.

Flat Doggie Style

Put two-three pillows under your stomach and hips so you're elevated. Instead of putting your legs on either side of your partner, snake them between theirs so that they can enter you with your legs closed. Penetration is super deep, without being uncomfortable. This position keeps you and your partner super close, which makes for amazing skin-on-skin contact and deep make-outs.

Lotus

Have your partner sit on the bed and climb onto their lap. Slide onto them, face-to-face. The classic lotus (seated face-to-face) is a tantric favorite because of its intensity. This position is both easy to do and very intimate. It allows for deep, passionate kissing and clitoral stimulation, either manually or with a toy. Instead of bouncing up and down on your partner, move your hips back and forth to get the most stimulation.

Open-Legged Spoon

Instead of having your partner lie directly behind you, have them lie beneath your legs while you lie on your back. They should be perpendicular to your body, creating a T-shape between the two of you. Drape your legs over their side and open your knees. You’ll have optimal clitoris access while keeping this lazy position intact. Everyone wins in this position. Everyone gets off, and no one gets exhausted.

“Non-phallic sex toys decenter the penis, allowing a more comfortable, pleasurable experience for those who may not be attracted to men or a penis,” says Shamyra Howard, Sexologist, LCSW.

She adds that they’re also powerful tools for those who have experienced trauma, explaining, “Non-phallic sex toys allow survivors of sexual assault to reclaim their bodies, sexuality, and sex life. Many survivors who were violated by a person with a penis want to explore sexuality while de-centering the penis. Non-phallic sex toys provide users with another chance at safe, no-pressure sexual exploration.”

Finally, these sex toys transcend the limits of a phallic object, allowing users to explore pleasure beyond penetration. Non-phallic sex toys come in a variety of different shapes and sizes, allowing users to better access areas like the clitoris and rectum, as well as erogenous zones all over the body. Howard agrees, “Non-phallic sex toys are often multi-functional and can provide pleasurable stimulation to other erogenous zones such as the clitoris, nipples, inner things, neck, breasts, knees, and labia.”

• Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Suction: Womanizer Next Clitoral Suction Stimulator
• Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Beginners: Dame Fin
• Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy for Partner Play: Dame Eva
• Best Wearable Non-Phallic Sex Toy: Vesper Vibrator Necklace
• Best Non-Phallic Sex Toy Overall: Njoy Pure Wand Stainless Steel Dildo

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Meet the Expert

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A handful of these options take place in silence or give you ample opportunity to discuss what's happening around you—so even if the date doesn't work out, you get to have the experience regardless! Plus, you'll get to know a person even better by putting them into a situation they may not be used to, like cycling or going to an arcade. Ahead, 80 fun dates—including cheap date ideas for couples on a budget and at-home dates if you're stuck inside—to get you started.

Creative Date Ideas

Visit an Art Gallery

Whether you're a true art buff or just along for the ride, this one's a great quiet place for both of you to gauge each other's interests and conversational skills. Choose a fun, exciting gallery or photo exhibit that's not too obscure if you're anxious about not having enough to talk about.

Walk Around a Museum 

Similarly, museums have new or rotating exhibits—even if you've been before, there might be something new to see. They also have spaces to sit, eat, and chat, and potentially architecture or gardens that offer options to walk around. Museums are designed to spark engagement and conversation, which is perfect. At the very least you can laugh about not understanding the significance of everything.

Take a Cooking Class 

You’ll know right away if the relationship stands a chance once you find out who’s better in the kitchen. Approaching it from the right attitude—just have fun and be willing to make a mess!—means you'll have a blast.

Make Pasta Together

Carbs and a significant other? Sign us up. Sure, buying boxed noodles seems easier, but watching someone crank out some dough is an unspoken turn-on. (There, we said it.)

Go to Wine School 

You read that right: Not just wine-tasting, wine school. This will help you feel classy and cultured as you learn how to properly taste the beverage, differentiate between types, find what you like best, and, yes, drink some delicious wine. There's always something to discuss while you sip!

Meet Up for a Mixology Class

Learn how to craft your favorite fancy cocktail—or design an entirely new custom drink together—while taking a mixology class. You might even finally learn what all those accessories that came with the cocktail shaker on your bar cart are used for!

Set Up a Chopped Challenge

Bring out your competitive side and get creative in the kitchen by taking a page out of the Food Network’s book and crafting a Chopped-style challenge for you and your date. Pick a few random ingredients that each of you will need to incorporate into a dish of your choosing, set a time limit, and hit the kitchen. Once time’s up, do a taste test and score each other’s dishes on taste, presentation, and creativity—and remember, if all goes awry, you can always call in an emergency takeout order to eat instead while you laugh about your culinary fails.

Shop at a Thrift Store 

Hit up your local Goodwill to browse through the racks together. You could find your new, favorite gem. You could also make a game of it by giving each other 30 minutes to find the flashiest outfits to wear to dinner right after. Look at you being all fun and sustainable!

Visit a Flea Market

Whether you’re into vintage clothes and your date is into artisan furniture, or they’re into hand-crafted jewelry and you’re on the hunt for new artwork, there’s no doubt you could spend hours pursuing a flea market together. With various sellers and makers displaying their best goods for sale, from unique art and tchotchkes to thrifted threads, there would surely be many fun finds to look through together. Most cities have at least one frequent, recurring flea, or special pop-up at the very least; just be on the lookout.

Go Window-Shopping

If your area has a shop-lined street, go looking without making any impulse purchases. Start fun conversations by going into a wildly expensive store with things you can't afford or a knickknack store with random trinkets. These areas can be bustling around rush hour, with plenty to do and see (plus restaurants if all that perusing works up an appetite).

Go on a Scavenger Hunt 

Make like Leslie Knope and become a novice treasure hunter! One kind of global treasure hunt is called geocaching, some cities have formal hunts, and universities like MIT have competitive annual competitions. You could also take the stakes way lower by simply walking around to see if you can spot certain objects. It's like a hike, with a purpose!

Throw Yourselves a Mini Party 

Throw yourselves a themed bash (guests: the two of you!) featuring inexpensive decorations, some lights, and festive cocktails. You could try a kids' party theme, a luau, a '90s costume party, or something the two of you make up. If you want to expand it into double-date territory, great, otherwise make it the most exclusive party ever.

Get to Tie-Dyeing

There is a '70s fashion revival, so it's the perfect time for you and your date to jump in on the trend. Pick up a tie-dye kit at your local craft store, set it up outside, and go all out to see who can create the most colorful tee.

Find a Pottery Class

Get your hands dirty and make some art together—you can get to know each other while making a new addition for your home. So, even if the date is bad, you’ll at least feel like your time wasn't wasted. And if the vase looks ridiculous but the date went well, you'll have a funny story!

Check Out a Paint and Sip Class

If either of your creative skills are lacking, a class that tell you exactly what to paint and how to paint it may be up your alley. Bring along your favorite bottle of vino and laugh at each other's attempts at becoming Picasso.

Hit Up a Karaoke Bar

If it works for mandatory coworker bonding, it's worth a try for a fun stranger date. Even if you're not exactly Zooey Deschanel in the vocals department, it's more about enjoying the moment and showing your personality. Be sure to ask first before you spring it on them, though.

See a Local Band Perform

You don’t need tickets to an arena show or a sold-out tour coming through town to see great live music. Support a local artist or band and an independent music venue by checking out a concert from your hometown scene. You and your date can chat between the sets, and years from now you might be able to say, “I saw them perform before they were famous.”

Take in a New Art Form

If you feel like you’ve exhausted all the typical “show” options for dinner-and-a-show dates, it might be time to get a little artsy-fartsy. Rather than heading for the movie theater, comedy club, or concert arena, mix things up by taking in a ballet performance, a modern dance recital, a play, or classical music, then put on your best art critic berets and discuss the meanings of the performance.

Speak at an Open Mic

It's one thing to attend a poetry reading or comedy show, it's quite another to get up and bare your soul to a group of strangers. Granted, this one's not for people who get stage fright. If that's the case, you can sit and cheer while your date takes the plunge.

Active Date Ideas

Go Rock Climbing

If you both have an appetite for adventure and want to undergo the ultimate dating "survival test," there's nothing quite like being suspended from great heights on a harness while you're clinging for dear life to do it.

Go Bowling 

Whether you're a strike machine or a 10-pin novice, bowling alleys are a lot of fun, from the beer and cheap pizza to the rush of that first strike. Set up the bumper guards to avoid embarrassment or go no-holds-barred for a competitive match. Just go easy on each other if one of you is better.

Ride Bikes 

Get some fresh air and ride some bikes together. It’s the perfect intro to part two of your date: a picnic in the park (keep reading)—where you can sit down, relax, and enjoy each other’s company. And the food will be worth it because you exercised!

Take a Run Around Town

If you and your new date are the athletic sort, what better way to bond than through a shared passion? For anyone hoping for a more low-key activity, trying an exercise class, hitting the gym, or even walking at a decent pace can all fit the bill.

Go for a Skate

Not all roller skaters were born with balance, but taking a risk with a roller skating date can take the seriousness out of a first date that typically involves wining and dining. A few falls later and you'll both be a whole lot closer, if a bit bruised.

Take Dancing Lessons

Sign up for an hour of dancing lessons where both of you are beginners. Even if your partner has two left feet, you'll be bonded by learning a skill together. Stay for the all-couple dance session afterward once you're starting to get the hang of it, or retire elsewhere for a bite to eat.

Go Out Dancing

No dance lessons are required to groove on the dance floor at a local club. Once you two have gotten to know each other, you might have a blast showing off your moves under the light of a disco ball. See live music and boogie to the beat, look up what bars have a DJ spinning their selects, or impress your date by following local DJs in your area and taking them to one of their parties.

Go Axe Throwing 

Not only is this an out-there date idea, but it's a great stress reliever too. There's just something about throwing a heavy axe at a wooden target that makes us forget about our worries and act as if we were on a one-on-one Bachelor date.

Go Horseback Riding

We got to love those Bachelor dates! To emulate some fairy tale romance, spend a day at the stables riding trail horses for the afternoon. If neither of you have much equestrian experience, take a couple of laps around the paddock before trotting out into the wilderness

Play Mini Golf

Even though you're way past the age for miniature golf, the low-stakes game allows for some lighthearted fun without feeling like you need to be competitive (and if the other person gets a little crazy about it, that'll probably tell you a lot). Plus, the yawn-worthy pace of golf means you can chat and play without interruption.

Try Sky-Diving

Another date that sounds like it's straight out of The Bachelor, impress your thrill-seeking date with one of the coolest activities out there. You could also trade it out with another heights-heavy activity like bungee jumping, but it'll immediately establish you as the coolest first date ever. Plus, it'll be hilarious if you're both getting over your fear of heights together.

A Day of Light Sports and Games

If you're not into the traditional first date thing, take a lighthearted sports bar approach to the date night with an outdoorsy game of badminton, beach volleyball, or pickleball. This can also be a blast as a group activity.

Play Shuffleboard

Shuffleboard is a classic bar game, but you haven’t really played until you’ve made your way to a shuffleboard court. If there’s a shuffleboard club in your city, booking a court will make for a lively night, as you use tangs (shuffleboard's official term for cues) to move biscuits (the discs) down the 52-foot-length court where you face off in a friendly competition. If you go with friends or another couple, the two of you could also form a team and show off your skills as a unit.

Yoga in the Park 

Put on your workout clothes and head to the park for some fresh air and relaxation. Partner yoga positions are always the move, and you can get to know each other in more ways than one(!). Plus, they'll have a new respect for how hard yoga is.

Go Ice Skating

Bundle up and support your local ice skating rink. Learning or teaching (you little pro!) someone a new thing helps bring people together, so get ready to watch the sparks fly. Don't forget to grab some hot chocolate after!

Play a Round of Laser Tag 

No, laser tag is not just for 13-year-olds at birthday parties. It's a great way to have some friendly competition on a date and it's a fun way to work up a sweat. Up the ante with a little wager: The loser has to buy the first round of drinks.

Fun Date Ideas

Play Arcade Games

For those with a short attention span and an adventurous spirit, get to know your date over an adrenaline-racing round of arcade games. Play up your competitive side or join forces as a team against another pair with a game of foosball. And, if you're terrible at games like me, play a couple rounds then cheer your date on as they're crushing it.

Go to a Carnival 

Appeal to your inner child by buying tickets for a carnival. It may seem cliché, but embrace the cheesiness—share cotton candy, let them try to win you a prize and ride a roller coaster if you've got the stomach for it. It's a great way to get to know each other while having fun at the same time and talking about your memories of childhood.

Ride Some Roller Coasters

If you're both thrill-seekers, an amusement park is a great way to spend a day. Just think of all the deep convos you can have standing in line for rides. Plus, roller coasters and games have a way of bringing out the fun side of people.

Try Out an Escape Room

You'll find out just how compatible you and your date are in a matter of minutes in an escape room. The two of you will have to work together to solve riddles and uncover clues to discover the secret of the room. These can be seriously fun, or seriously infuriating, depending on who you're with, so proceed with caution.

Walk Around the Zoo

Show off your knowledge of your favorite animals at your local zoo. Not only is it a sure way to get your steps in, but it's a fun way to spend time outdoors. Plus, you can always use the excuse of the chilly penguin house to cuddle up to your date.

Sample Treats at a Food Festival 

Big holidays like Chinese New Year and annual food festivals are excellent opportunities to sample bites while you get to know someone. All the various food options and the mingling in a crowd will give you a good chance to survey how adventurous and adaptable the other person is, too. Bonus: You might find a new place for an upcoming dinner date.

Book a Food Tour

Instead of pairing your dinner with a show, make the meal itself the entertainment. Either sign up for a local food tour around your city—whether organized around a specific neighborhood, cuisine, or historical event—or build your own, complete with score sheets, to look for the city’s best doughnut, dumpling, or slice of pizza.

Go Get Sundaes

Don't just walk to get ice cream—lean in. Compete to see which of you can craft the most delicious/ridiculous concoction, then race to eat them before they melt. Bonus points if you can make something your date wants more than their creation.

Watch a Local Sports Game 

Sure, it's fun to watch your city or state's team play, but try a sport you guys have never watched or supported before—like netball or rowing, for instance. Local colleges and universities often have games open to the public, and there should be enough space to sit, watch, and listen to yourselves talk while you cheer (and try to explain the rules of the game to each other).

Seek Out a Pool 

In the warmer months, this could mean a roof deck with a water feature, in the winter it could mean a jacuzzi or splashing around in a public pool. But if you're hanging out poolside, it's a relaxing and chill vibe. If you're diving in (pun intended) with bathing suits on, that could be quite sexy, right? Just make sure your date's up for it before you go.

Go to the Beach 

Whether you live by an ocean, lake, or body of water, a day out on the sand is always a calming date spot if the weather's playing nice. If you're feeling it, rock a two-piece and offer to apply sunscreen. Soak in some sunshine near the water and as the day draws to a close, take a romantic stroll with the setting sun as an Instagram-worthy backdrop.

Watch an Outdoor Movie Screening

There are plenty of open-air venues like parks and rooftops that you can visit during warmer months; even better, many have old, classic movies or shows. The shared atmosphere and classic flick are a perfect combo.

Go to a Drive-In Movie Theater

It may be a bit of a drive, but the chances are you live less farther than you might expect from a drive-in movie theater. These throwback establishments still screen new releases and tend to play retrospective titles, but it’s as much about the experience as it is about the movie. It’ll be a kitschy-cute time tuning the radio or setting up the sound device in your vehicle, making your seats or trunk especially cozy, and curating the perfect menu of snacks.

Attend an Outdoor Concert

This one's a definite time commitment, so you might want to get to know each other over a drink or meal before going for this option. But the perks of an outdoor show, especially if you both love the band, are the good vibes. If there's space on the lawn, pack a blanket, or you can get up close and personal in the pit.

Go to a Burlesque or Drag Show

These acts are designed to be entertaining, sexy, or laugh-out-loud funny. The scene is loud and boisterous, and the food and drink scene is usually fun, too. It's like the old dinner and a show—but make it cool.

Support the Local Arts

It's pretty much a guarantee that you'll find a local play, poetry reading, dance troupe, or other public event to attend—and it's supporting local culture, even if it doesn't end up being your cup of tea.

Go to a Comedy Show

Sharing a few laughs is one way to become closer to your date. Head to your favorite comedian's show or pop in at an open mic night for some lighthearted fun. If the two of you are feeling brave, sit in the front row and maybe you'll get picked on for a few jokes at your expense.

Head to the Aquarium 

No ambiance is more romantic than the hush of a soft-lit aquarium. Stroll through the darkened rooms while you point out your favorite creatures behind the glass. Some aquariums offer interactive educational exhibits and teach guests eco-friendly ways to clean up the ocean, so you'll feel like you got something out of it.

Take a Ferry Ride

The length of a 30-minute ferry ride from one locale to the other is the perfect bite-sized date option for people who don't want to have to drag things out over dinner or drinks. It's a good chance to get fresh air and assess whether you might want to go on a post-excursion drink or coffee.

Take a Boat Tour

If you'd rather see things from the water, be it a water taxi or duck boat tour, this can be a fun date option (and some boats offer cocktails, as another plus!). This requires a sizable body of water, so the landlocked may want to consider kayaking or fishing at a local lake.

Attend Trivia Night at a Local Bar

Combine powers to form a dream team at trivia night. You'll laugh as you rack your brains for city names and bond over your knowledge of obscure horror films. Plus, drinks are usually on the house if you end up winning.

Go to a Brewery 

One great all-season date for booze lovers is a brewery tour. You can sip on the latest IPAs and ciders while getting to know each other—it's a win-win. The same goes for a winery or cidery: Most places know the key is a killer ambiance.

Find a Board Game Bar

Board game bars are popping up everywhere these days. Snag a table, order a round of drinks or some bites to eat, and settle in for some friendly competition. It’s up to you whether you introduce each other to your childhood faves or learn the rules of a new game together—then prepare for victory at the next couples game night you’re invited to.

Have a Game Night

Switch up your plans to stay in by breaking out your favorite board games, or even a deck of playing cards. There are always new games on the market, too, so you could each come prepared with something that sounds fun to you and give both of your suggestions a try. Game night is also a cost-effective way to hang out with other couples and friends; splitting up pairs could even make for some playful competition.

Work on a Puzzle 

Call us old-fashioned, but nothing is more relaxing than putting together a 500-piece puzzle with someone. The conversation flows, and if you run out of stuff to talk about, you can hold up a piece to ask where its counterpart is. BOOM, instant conversation. There are dozens of chic puzzles available nowadays, and you could even gift your date one that reflects their interests.

Play a Video Game

Channel your inner gamer and face off in a video game tournament. The two of you could introduce each other to your favorite games, so you each have the opportunity to whoop the other one and play something new.

Volunteer Locally 

If you both have a cause you support (or if a place nearby needs your help), consider signing up to volunteer. There'll be plenty to keep you busy, you'll feel like your time went to good use, and you may even bond over the experience.

Go on a (Mini) Vacation

For those who love to travel but don't want to (or can't) go far, take a bus or a train an hour away to see the local sights and escape your daily routine. Treat it like a real vacay, with fun local snacks and sightseeing. Even though it's just a skip and a jump away, it's like a whole new world.

Go on a Ghost Tour

There's nothing like some collective scares to bring people together. If your town has some history, there's a good chance there's a local guide to share the town's local haunts. A ghost tour under the stars may sound eerie to some, but to fright-lovers, it's an ideal first date.

Ride on Scooters

If your town has a scooter, consider yourself lucky. Not only are they a cheap and easy way to get around town, but they would also make for an exciting date. Scooter rentals exist, as well, so you could go for a joy ride or use one en route to your next date destination in style.

Go to IKEA

You may think, "Why would I go to a furniture store?" But this isn't just any old furniture store. It's IKEA! No one has ever sighed before telling someone they were making their merry way to the famous Swedish furniture store. Also, it has a food court with some incredible cake, which is great after a day of picking out your dream space.

Cute Date Ideas

Stargaze Together 

You + the great outdoors + your date who you pray is into this as much as you are = the perfect date. Don't forget to bring a comfy blanket, snacks, and have a chill playlist for your evening under the stars.

Enjoy a Bonfire

If either of you have a yard, then you're set to have a romantic evening under the stars. Grab some firewood, smores, blankets, and lawn chairs, and chat around a bonfire. It's a cheap way to get to know someone, and who doesn't love the smell of a bonfire?

Pack a Picnic

Keep it simple with a stroll through the park followed by a picnic lunch on the green. Pick out your favorite frozen treats from an ice cream vendor, and chat while you hang out in the grass. You can even people-watch while you're at it. The best part? It's cheaper than an expensive dinner.

Peruse a Farmers Market

Feel sustainable and healthy (and maybe pick up something for dinner) as you walk by stands of gorgeous fruits, vegetables, and locally made goods. If you've never been, it's also a way to educate yourselves on what's in season and what cool local vendors have delicious stuff you can add to your meal rotation.

Go Fruit Picking

As long as it's not winter, there's likely a farm nearby where you can stroll along and pick fruits like berries, apples, and even pumpkins. Help each other pick the best fruit over great convos then enjoy a cup of cider or two. If the date goes well, you can even head home to bake yourselves a pie.

Bake a Sweet Treat Together

Enjoy a sweet with your sweet! While you could go out for dessert, you could also take a trip to the grocery store, source all the ingredients for a recipe, and spend an afternoon or evening in the kitchen whipping up something delectable. Baking lava cakes in ramekins would be the perfect dish for two, cookies are always reliable, or there’s always the option of baking a cake and decorating it together once it’s out of the oven.

Make Like Tourists in Your Own Neighborhood

Pick a couple of nearby landmarks or activities and commit to experiencing them like you don't live there. Embarking on a local trip will make for a unique shared experience and give you the fun feeling of "discovering" your area for the first time. Fanny pack optional.

Restaurant Hop

If you’re near one of their locations, Eataly is the perfect place to explore and eat some great food. If not, try and find some local food trucks to get a taste (or two or three) of what they enjoy. Instead of settling in and only experiencing one place, hopping around can make for some fun discussion.

Share Your Favorite Spot

Is there a beautiful mural you love by your home? The perfect place to watch the sunset? That little hole-in-the-wall bakery with the best donuts? Take a walk and share the little details you love about your area, and encourage the other person to do the same.

Go to a Planetarium 

The hushed atmosphere of a planetarium combined with the dark room makes for an ideal ambiance for a first date. Spend an evening gazing at the stars and learning about the constellations, with lots of hand-holding potential.

Tour a Botanical Garden

There's no better place to explore on a date than the pretty manicured lawns and gardens of a botanical garden. Pro tip: Plan to go later in the day or after the summer rush if you don't want to sweat in a greenhouse at mid-day. If they allow food, this can also be a perfect picnic spot.

Get an Astrology Chart or Tarot Reading

Good vibes only. This would be a memorable experience, whether you're an avid follower of astrology and the supernatural or not. Embrace whatever energy comes from the reading, and perhaps learn more about your date's personality (and whether or not you're wasting your time!).

Peruse a Bookstore

When you're both book nerds, a day spent browsing your local bookstore is the ideal setup to get you bonding over your favorite titles. It also allows you to give each other suggestions on what to read next. Just making sure you're not getting too lost among the shelves that you're not paying attention to your date.

Watch the Sunrise

This may not be for everyone (a person who doesn't like getting up early, for example), or for every time of year, but there's something magical about trucking out together in the early morning to watch the sky change color. Bonus: Go to brunch after.

Find a Gorgeous View

Whether your city has a Ferris wheel, observation deck, or another sky-high view, find a location that helps you see your area from a new perspective. That could be traveling a few miles out or even just going to a roof deck to help you look at things in a new way together.

Head to the Spa

Get solo or couples' massages! Chill out in the jacuzzi! Hang out in the sauna! There's much to do here, especially after a long, exhausting day. Just ensure you're both at the same level of comfort (maybe one of you prefers a non-nude spa, you know?).

Attend an Open House

Have you ever walked by an open house of a beautiful building and thought, It must be so gorgeous in there. Go see how the other half lives, ogle some stunning decor, and talk about what you like and don't like. Best case: It might be useful later on! Worst case: cool architecture, and you don't have to talk much.

Meet Furry Friends at a Cat Cafe

Why drink coffee at a regular cafe when you can drink coffee at a cat cafe? Sip on your espresso drink of choice while surrounded by cute, cuddly cats. Who knows? Maybe one of you will head home with a new furry friend.

Head to the Dog Park

Take your furry friend out to the dog park for some much-needed playtime. You'll both get a kick out of watching the pups and your dog will love the chance to expel some energy. It's a win-win. Don't have a dog? Sneak in before someone calls you out on it.

So, this month consider indulging in a vibrator or dildo so that you can better explore your needs and desires. In fact, there's no better time than now to look into expanding (or starting!) your sex toy collection: Woman-founded sex toy retailer Babeland is hosting a tremendous online sale in which you can take $25 off any order of more than $125 when you use the promo code MARCH25 at checkout. Plus, you can get free (and discreet) shipping when you spend at least $69 on the site. 

The best part? The brand is partnering with the National Network of Abortion Funds, offering limited edition merchandise whose proceeds go towards providing women in need with safe, affordable abortions. On Babeland's site, you can also easily add a donation as low as $1 to your subtotal when you check out.

Below, check out some of my favorite items from the sale. Could there possibly be a more pleasurable way to donate to women's rights? If there is, I've yet to find it. 

As a passionate proponent and writer of all things sexual wellness, I admit that I own a vibrator or two (or three or four...). Each one is a little different, geared toward g-spot or clitoral stimulation or both, and they're made from various materials and intended for various purposes, whether for solo or partner play. But of all the sex toys I've encountered, I've never come to know anything remotely comparable to the Crave Vesper Vibrator Necklace. 

The basics: This fully functioning bullet vibrator is made from body-safe stainless steel with a single silicone button positioned at its base. The button both turns the vibrator on and allows users to cycle between the tool's four separate vibration speeds as well as its two modes: constant or pulsing. And, uniquely, the vibrator comes with a removable chain at its base so that it can be worn as a long necklace.

When it comes to vibration quality, this toy packs an impressive punch—especially considering its small size. I've often turned it on while in social settings so that my curious friends can feel how intense the vibrations are, and every time, their eyes widen and they marvel at how such a tiny, thin piece of steel can yield such a strong (but quiet!) effect. 

But that's not the only reason this vibrator makes me feel so empowered.

Since I was in high school, I've always loved wearing necklaces—particularly long ones that reach down to my sternum, transforming any plain shirt or lackluster outfit into something far more unique. Jewelry has always been one of my favorite ways of expressing myself, and I like buying pieces that speak to who I am and what I believe in, much in the same way that one buys pins or patches announcing their political stances. And to me, wearing a vibrator as a necklace is not just a highly effective way of upping one's flirting game, though it is certainly that. It is also one of the most powerful means of announcing myself as a feminist. 

A number of studies, both anecdotal and statistical, point to the fact that a lack of sexual education increases rates of sexual assault and teen pregnancy. When children and adolescents are not taught about contraception and pleasure before they begin to have sex (which is the case for more than 60 percent of sexually active young adults in the U.S.), they don't understand how to prevent STDs or unwanted pregnancies, and they don't possess the emotional and communication tools needed to navigate mutual consent and pleasure. Furthermore, denying young people comprehensive, practical, pleasure-inclusive sexual education means denying them the tools they need to identify, prevent, and address sexual assault when it happens—something that has a particularly traumatic impact on women and the LGBTQ community. 

Finally, when we teach abstinence-only sexual education, we remove female and LGBTQ pleasure from the equation entirely. This sets these communities up to believe that their pleasure, and therefore their consent, is entirely unnecessary, when in reality it's absolutely essential. 

For these reasons, I like talking about sex—particularly about female pleasure and how important it is—just about any chance I get. I believe that, by being open and unashamed, each and every one of us has the power to erase stigma and to help others release their own feelings of shame. I love that my Vesper Vibrator Necklace starts countless conversations about sex, pleasure, and sex toys; love that it creates a fun, low-pressure environment in which people feel more comfortable talking about their own experiences with pleasure and perceptions about toys. 

And I feel powerful when I'm wearing my Vesper. Although it's subtle, and even my most sexually liberated friends don't realize that it's a vibrator, wearing my Vesper is my way of infusing my ensemble with my feminist beliefs. It asserts my stance as a sex-positive woman who prioritizes her own experience, who has the courage to pursue what she wants and needs, and who believes herself worthy of pleasure—and chic, high-performance pleasure, at that. 

Does all this speak to you? Then you're in luck. This week, online sex retailer Lovehoney is having a tremendous sale that involves up to 50 percent off of select sex toys, $25 and under lingerie, and free (and discreet) one-day shipping when you spend at least $200. Plus, all of their products are rigorously tested and vetted, so you can trust that you're receiving high-quality items made exclusively from body-safe material.

However, the variety of sex card games out there is surprisingly large. For that reason, we've asked sex expert Esther Perel to share with us her ultimate guidance on why you should try sex card games and how to find the right one for you. 

"It is the quality of our relationships that determines the quality of our lives," Perel maintains, when explaining her penchant for sex card games and her drive to create her own game, Where Should We Begin. "Today, we often need new resources to help us manage the complexity of relationships, because the norms are shifting under our feet, and the rules that guided us through the relational landscapes have really changed massively. So we often find ourselves with a lot of choice, but also a lot of self-doubt, and a lot of uncertainty."

During the pandemic, Perel explains, this sense of uncertainty and isolation magnified, inspiring her to find "a playful way, an educational technology, a social technology that is playful, that is fun, that allows people to try out things and to take risks within the safe container of a game."

Why a Sex Card Game?

"One of the beautiful things about playing a game is that it gives you a different script than the one that you just had in your head when you were playing the role of the spouse or the partner," says Perel. Games, she explains, can spice up a relationship or simply prevent monotony by allowing you and your partner to switch up your prescribed script and find a new way to be intimate—both physically and emotionally. 

Plus, she says, framing intimacy as game-play can allow both partners to feel more at ease than they might in normal circumstances. "If I tell you a story and it's very serious and linear, it's completely different than if I'm telling you the story that is wrapped in a ritual called, 'We're playing,'" she says.

She also points out that card games are a more familiar, comfortable way of adding variety to your sex life than sex toys might be. "It's not about buying a certain toy or sexual accoutrements or a candle or anything like that," she says. In those situations, she admits, "people may laugh, because it feels awkward; because it doesn't fit anymore in the relationship." On the other hand, card games often encourage storytelling and structured exploration.

"Storytelling is a wonderful bridge to each other," she says, explaining that they can encourage vulnerability with one another without forcing it. "In the course of telling stories, you find yourself suddenly experiencing vulnerability that you never anticipated. It just suddenly came over you, but you are protected by the game. So when it's somebody else's turn, there's an end to it. You're not tied to 45 minutes in a [couples' therapy] session."

What To Look For in a Sex Card Game

When selecting a sex card game, it's important to consider the type of romantic experience you're looking to have. For instance, are you looking to verbally answer questions that can serve as foreplay (i.e., a question about your favorite kinks or about your favorite parts of your partner's body) or would you prefer a game whose cards dare you to perform certain sex acts?

If you want to start by taking it slow, Perel recommends finding a game with open-ended questions. This way, each partner can ease their way into the vulnerable, often sexual, mindset. "I love open-ended questions because it allows people to then take them anywhere they want," she says. "No yes and no answers, but stories that it's like the power of the imagination."

Furthermore, it's important to consider how competitive you want your game to be. When Perel was making her game, she says she considered all sorts of possibilities: "I thought, what card game should it be? Do you win against each other?" 

Just as she considered these "game mechanics" when crafting the rules for Where Should We Begin, you should also consider what sort of logistics would work best within you and your partner's dynamic.

And if you or your partner are still nervous about the pressure that a sex card game might instill, Perel says to look for games with different levels of intensity or intimacy. In those cases, "nothing is geared towards pushing you for revelation. You can play it completely safe, you can position yourself at any level you want."

• Best Sex Card Game Overall: Where Should We Begin: A Game of Stories
• Best Sex Card Game to Play with Friends: We're Not Really Strangers XXX
• Best Sex Card Game for Casual Partners: On the Green Couch "Use Your Mouth " Sex and Relationship Conversation Starter Cards
• Best Sex Card Game for Long-Term Relationships: Tantric Sex Cards (50 Pack)
• Best Sex Card Game for Foreplay: Unbound Truth or Dare Cards
• Best Sex Card Game for Getting Down to Business: Let's Get Naked Card Game

Best Sex Card Games For Emotional Intimacy

Sex Card Games for Physical Intimacy

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

"One of the main reasons why vibrators feel so good is because of electricity," explains Shamyra Howard, a Lovehoney sexologist and Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW). "Every vibrator, no matter the size, operates with a motor inside. This allows our bodies to have different response signals to varying speeds, motions, and intensities. It is thought that vibrators feel so good because they transmit frequencies that we as humans are incapable of doing to some of the most sensitive areas of the body."

Personally, I used to think that vibrators were overrated, but when I learned more about the many styles and types of vibrators, I realized that this sex toy is far more versatile than many of us have given it credit for. Vibrators come in a variety of shapes, sizes, textures, and vibration options, and the sensations they can offer range from gentle to mind-blowingly intense.

With that in mind, I've spoken to a variety of sexperts to set the record straight about different types of vibrators, choosing the right one for you, and, of course, the very best vibrators on the market today.

The Overall Best Vibrators

• Best Vibrator for Beginners: Lovehoney Magic Bullet 10 Function Silver Bullet Vibrator
• Best Bullet Vibrator: FemmeFunn Ultra Bullet
• Best Wand Vibrator: Magic Wand Original
• Best G-Spot Vibrator: Lovehoney Desire Luxury Rechargeable G-Spot Vibrator
• Best Clitoral-Stimulating Vibrator: Womanizer Pro W500
• Best Oral Sex Simulating Vibrator: LELO Ora 3
• Best Dual-Stimulating Vibrator: plusOne Dual Vibrating Massager
• Best Vibrator for Partner Play: Dame Eva II
• Best Remote-Controlled Vibrator: We-Vibe Sync
• Best On-The-Go Vibrator: Unbound Puff Suction Vibe
• Best Anal Vibrator: Rocks Off Teazer Petite Sensations Beginner's Vibrating Butt Plug

Best Vibrators for Beginners

It's easy to feel overwhelmed by the breadth of sex toy options, particularly if you're new to using vibrators and dildos. Remember that we all have to start somewhere and that the best toys for beginners are those that with simple operations and versatile options. Ahead, expert-approved options that are easy to use and non-intimidating to behold.

Best Bullet Vibrators

Howard often tells beginners to use a bullet vibrator as a means of gently exploring vibrational pleasure for the first time, explaining that the model is "easily accessible, inexpensive, and provides fantastic clitoral stimulation. Bullet vibrators can also be used on other erogenous areas."

Best Wand Vibrators

Wondering what type of vibrator is best for exploring erogenous zones beyond your clitoris, vagina, and anus? Consider the wand vibrator. Howard says, "If you’d like a vibe that can be used for clitoral stimulation and to explore erogenous zones such as nipples, behind the knees, ankles, the labia, and more, then a wand will be your toy of choice."

Best G-Spot Vibrators

Ah, the mysterious g-spot. Women who orgasm from penetrative sex are usually triggered by stimulation to this elusive area—a preference that may call for a g-spot vibrator or other penetrative toy.

Not sure where the g-spot is, exactly? You're not the only one, so Howard is here to explain: "The g-spot is said to be a sensitive area located at least two to three inches inside the vagina," she says. "One way to stimulate the area is by using a finger in the 'come here' motion. New theories suggest that the g-spot is actually a part of the internal clitoris. Some people report intense orgasms when this area is stimulated. A better way to stimulate the g-spot is by using a g-spot vibrator."

Best Clitoral-Stimulating Vibrators

The clitoris is the only known human organ whose sole purpose is physical pleasure, so why not celebrate it? The following types of vibrators are designed specifically for women who prefer clitoral stimulation. They use innovative means like rumbling, suction, air puffs, and traditional vibrations to incite pleasure.

Best Oral Sex Simulating Vibrators

Oral sex is an extremely specific sensation, and sometimes the feeling of sucking, blowing, or tongue-like strokes is precisely what one craves when indulging in some sexy time. As a result, a number of vibrators are made to mimic that feeling, and we've uncovered some of the very best.

Best Rabbit Vibrators

It is, of course, possible to want both clitoral and g-spot stimulation at the same time, which can be difficult to maneuver if you're stimulating yourself sans partner or if you have a toy geared only for one from of pleasure. But never fear: There are products made specifically for dual stimulation, the best of which we've gathered below. A keyword to look out for when shopping for dual-stimulation toys is "rabbit vibrators," which Howard says are perfect for when you're looking to have it both ways.

Best Vibrators for Couples

Just because you have a pal in bed with you, doesn't mean you need to abandon your toys. In fact, there are countless toys made specifically for partner play. They're perfect for adding variation and additional stimulation to your sexual repertoire, and may also be just the ticket for spicing up a relationship.

Best Remote-Controlled Vibrators

Technology really can be a wonderful thing, and in the case of sex toys, it can be a gamechanger, injecting playfulness into a routine or maintaining a sense of intimacy between long-distance partners.

"Remote-controlled vibrators are often made for clitoral stimulation and work really well with a partner controlling the motions," Howard agrees. "Several app-control vibrators work well on dates and for people in long-distance relationships."

Best On-The-Go Vibrators

Sexual pleasure is an important part of many people's lives, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to ensure you have the tools you need to feel good when you're on the go. Here, we've gathered some of the best products for when you have to keep your bag light and your sex toys subtle—because it's not always feasible to carry around a 6-inch silicone toy.

Best Anal Vibrators

If you haven't given anal sex toys a chance yet, you could be missing out on a world of pleasure. It is, however, important to educate oneself about anal stimulation, acquire the proper lube, and start slow before jumping in.

"When it comes to anal stimulation, it’s always important to only use vibrators specifically designed for anal stimulation," Howard adds. "Anal vibrators will always have a flared base to prevent them from getting lost in the anus. Beginners would love the Rocks Off Teazer Petite Sensations Vibrating Butt Plug."

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

How To Use a Vibrator

If you're unsure how to use a vibrator, there are a number of sex toys designed for beginners. Plus, countless resources are available online, from the instruction manual that comes with your toy to thorough online guides by brands like Smile Makers and Lovehoney. Howard reminds us that not all vibrators are built the same, and different types have different purposes. Thus, it's important to take note of whether your vibrator is meant to be used on external or internal genitalia, on the anus or on the vagina, and so on.

Plus, one should always be stimulated and properly lubricated before using any toy. Howard points out that vibrators won't feel good if the user isn't already aroused, and explains, "The more aroused you are, the better the vibrator feels." So before you start using your toy, try stimulating yourself with your hands or watching something titillating, and consider adding some lube to the mix to ensure your vibrator experience is safe and comfortable.

There is some room for creativity, though. "They can be used for various reasons and on other body parts," she says. "That’s right: Vibrators are not just for use on the genitals."

So, once you're comfortable with how to use your vibrator the traditional way, see how it feels on other erogenous zones, like the nipples, base of your neck, or back of your knee.

Finding the Right Vibrator

Sexual pleasure is an incredibly personal, subjective experience, so selecting the right vibrator should be one, too. "The materials and shape of the vibrator are often the most influential factors in how vibrators impact everyone differently," says Kris Fretz, co-founder of sex toy brand Emojibator. "Personally, I’m more sensitive to the vibrator’s texture vs. intensity, so I look for toys that are made with medical-grade silicone so they are safe for bodily insertion."

In that vein, it's important to take note of what toys are made of when buying them. Silicone toys, for instance, should never be used with silicone lube, or they'll break down. And while sex toys can get pricey, Howard says that buying a high-quality option is well worth it.

"Since vibrators are used in one of the body's most sensitive areas, it’s essential to only use body-safe toys," she says.

Fretz also adds that one should consider how and for how long a toy will be used when looking at what it's made of, warning, "A toy can be made with other materials such as metal, and in those cases it’s important to not overuse the toy beyond the recommended usage time and spare your most sensitive areas from burning up."

Once you know what materials you're selecting and the type of stimulation you're going for, Fretz recommends staying open-minded. After all, the world of sex toys is characterized by constant innovation.

"While the vibrator industry began with rabbits and phallic-shaped dildos, our society has advanced so much further than these rigid ideas of what vibrators should look like," elaborates Fretz. "I encourage all shoppers to feel confident that they can experience great orgasms from any shaped vibrator that is made with safe materials. This freedom to explore makes sex toys more inclusive to the queer and sexual trauma communities who don’t feel represented in the mainstream sex toy industry."

Keep scrolling for a low-down on the different categories of vibrators meant to cater to all sexual preferences, along with products that are notorious for their good vibes.

Best Vibrators For Beginners

Everybody has to start somewhere, and for those who have never used a vibrator before, it's important to start slow and focus on exploration. The sex toys for beginners below have been vetted by sexperts and are wildly popular with customers, so that you can ease your way into vibrator play and learn what works best for you.

How We Chose

Every vibrator on this list has been hand-chosen by Marie Claire'sBeauty Writer, Gabrielle Ulubay, or has been recommended by a sex expert, such as a gynecologist, sex therapist, pelvic floor specialist, or other professional with verified, substantial experience in the sexual wellness field. Every single product is made from body-safe, high-quality material, has been rigorously tested for safety, is made by a well-established brand, is sold by reputable vendors, and has been tested by our editor, sex experts, or reviewers to guarantee efficacy. The best vibrator(s) for you depends on your anatomy, sexuality, and preferences, all of which we've taken into account when compiling this list.

Meet the Experts

But how do you go about finding a sex toy if you've never shopped for one before? Rachel Wright, a licensed psychotherapist and sexpert for Zumio, breaks down the process of getting started into a few simple steps: "Number one," she begins, "start with lube. Lube is the best first sex toy because it enhances every sexual experience we have — whether that's with our hands, other body parts, or a toy." And if you've never bought or used lube before, check out our guide to the best lubes and how to use them. 

"Then," continues Wright, "once you find a lube you like, think about the physical sensations you like and find a toy that can do them in a faster/longer/more intense/slightly different way than a human can." 

She adds that you don't need to "reinvent the wheel" or push yourself to try something new and adventurous. "When you're first starting out looking for a sex toy, don't reinvent the wheel. Start with what you know you like! Sex toys are meant to do things humans can't — so think of what you like with a human and find a sex toy that mimics that." 

For instance, if you dislike penetration, you're probably better off with a bullet vibrator or wand vibrator than a dildo, g-spot vibrator, or rabbit vibrator. Meanwhile, if you know you like anal stimulation, an anal vibrator or anal toy in general (and a bottle of lube!) may be best for you. And if you've never been with another person sexually before, gently explore your body with your fingers and with the help of a lube that's right for you, and pay attention to what you like and what you fantasize about.

Finally, don't ever be ashamed of feeling aroused, wanting sex, or masturbating. Owning and using a sex toy isn't shameful. In fact, it's a powerful way of exercising your sexual agency and taking pleasure into your own hands (pun intended)!

"There is so much stigma and misinformation about sex toys out there," admits Wright. "Some people think that they're a replacement for another person (they are not), that they'll make your bits go numb (they do not), and that they're somehow bad or deviant for wanting to use one (you're not!). Sex toys are meant to enhance your pleasure — think of them as pleasure aids." 

If you still have questions about what sex toys are and how to use them, check out our guides on every type of vibrator, how to use each type of vibrator, how to use a dildo, and our sexual wellness section in general. And read on for some of the best, easiest-to-use toys for beginners, whether you're looking to explore clitoral stimulation, penetration, anal play, kink, partner play, or beyond.

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Best Beginner Toys for Clitoral Stimulation

Did you know that less than 20 percent of people with vaginas achieve orgasm from penetrative sex alone? This means that, for most, people, clitoral stimulation is absolutely essential. Below, the best expert- and reviewer-approved toys for exploring this highly sensitive part of the body

Best Beginner Toys for Vaginal Penetration

Although, as previously mentioned, many people with vaginas need direct clitoral stimulation of some sort in order to achieve orgasm, many still enjoy and are even able to orgasm from penetration. Whether you're interested in g-spot vibrators, dildos, or life-like phallic replicas, scroll on for some of the best beginner penetrative toys available online right now. 

Best Anal Toys for Beginners

Anal stimulation can be extremely pleasurable for both men and women. Frye-Nekrasova reminds us, though, that when experimenting with anal play, be sure to use lots of lube (the rectum, unlike the vagina, does not self-lubricate), start small, and always use a toy that is meant for anal stimulation. The rectum is a lot like a vacuum, and will suck up anything that doesn't have a flared base, which can result in serious injury. And finally, to avoid putting yourself at risk of an infection, clean your toys and never put something on your clitoris or into your vagina after it's been in your rectum!

Best Beginner Sex Toys for Partner Play

Introducing sex toys into the bedroom with your partner is a fantastic way of spicing up your relationship or your sex life in general, but it can be a nerve-wracking experience, especially if it's a new practice for one or both of you. For detailed advice on how to broach the topic with your partner and find the best toy for you, check out our full guide on sex toys for partner play as well as our guide of vibrating panties. Otherwise, see below for some of the best and easiest to use toys to get started with, whether you're looking for a basic couples' vibrator, a remote toy, or you're interested in exploring kink. 

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

However, perusing Amazon's sex toy selection quickly becomes overwhelming due to the sheer number of options available on the site. For that reason, I've scoured Amazon reviews for the all-time best, safest, and most fun options they carry. I've also tapped a few experts, who contributed some of their must-have toys.

The best part? All of these can be delivered straight to your door.

• Best Clitoral Vibrator: Magic Wand Original
• Best Vibrator Overall: Womanizer Duo Rabbit Vibrator
• Best Dildo Overall: MOMONII Realistic Dildo
• Best Anal Vibrator: YOSPOSS Vibrating Anal Beads Butt Plug
• Best Anal Toy Overall: Njoy Pure Plug (Small)
•  Best Kink Toy Overall: Sportsheets Under The Bed Restraint System

Deals on Sex Toys on Amazon

Best Vibrators on Amazon

Vibrators are among the most popular sex toys of all time, and there are a slew of different types. From wand vibrators to G-spot vibrators to bullet vibrators to rabbit vibrators, Amazon carries them all. If you're a big fan of this sex toy and you're an Amazon devotee, check out our more extensive list of the best vibrators on Amazon. And if you have questions about how to use this iconic type of toy, check out our guide on how to use each kind of vibrator. 

Best Dildos on Amazon

Dildos come in all shapes and sizes, and can be used for either anal or vaginal play (depending on the dildo, of course). However, since these toys are meant to be inserted into one's body, it's extremely important to choose options that are made of the best, safest, and most comfortable size and material. Read on for a few of our favorites on Amazon, and check out our full guide to the all-time best dildos. And remember to use lots of lube!

Best Anal Toys on Amazon

Anal stimulation can be pleasurable for people of all genders, and anal toys can come in the form of both vibrators and dildos. It's important, though, to be sure that toys are made for anal stimulation before you use them. Frye-Nekrasova reminds us that, since the rectum is like a vacuum, anal toys have flared bases in order to ensure that they don't get sucked into the body.

Below, some of our favorite anal toys on Amazon. And if you're an anal aficionado or anal curious, check out our list of the best anal toys and our guide to the best lubes money can buy.

Best Kink Toys on Amazon

Kink toys have seen an incredible boom in popularity, particularly since the release of books and movies like 50 Shades of Grey. Frye-Nekrasova tells us that kink can be freeing for many people, allowing them to indulge in fantasies, express themselves, and explore more within their sexual relationships. As always, though, consent is paramount. It's important to discuss boundaries, fantasies, and safe words before and during kink and/or BDSM play. 

Interested in spicing up your playtime, and looking to get your toys quickly (and on a budget)? Check below for some of Amazon's best kink toys, from restraints to floggers and beyond.

How We Test

Every sex toy on this list has been hand-chosen by Marie Claire's E-Commerce Writer, Gabrielle Ulubay, or has been recommended by a sex expert, such as a gynecologist, sex therapist, or other sexual wellness expert with substantial, verifiable experience in the field. Every single product is made from body-safe, high-quality material, has been rigorously tested for safety, is made by a well-established brand, and is sold on by reputable vendors whose identity has been verified. Products have also been tested by our editor, by sex experts, or by reviewers in order to guarantee safety, shelf-life, efficacy. The best sex toy(s) for you depends on your anatomy, sexuality, comfort level, and preferences, all of which we've taken into account when compiling this list.

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

However, Amazon boasts an insane amount of products, and it's important to be discerning—particularly when buying a product that's intended to touch some of you and your partner's most sensitive body parts. Thus, we've consulted sexperts and sexologists and have combed through hundreds of products and reviews to bring you the very best vibrators on Amazon right now.

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The Best Clitoral Vibrators on Amazon

Many women prefer clitoral stimulation over penetration, and there are a variety of vibrators on the market that cater to this preference. In fact, much new sex toy technology, such as suction and air pleasure, is made to stimulate the clitoris in particular. Below, some of the most innovative and highly recommended vibrators on Amazon for your best clitoral experience yet.

The Best G-Spot Vibrators on Amazon

While the existence of the G-spot remains a highly contested (mostly because mainstream science consistently fails to invest in research on female pleasure), it's undeniable that many people with vaginas enjoy the G-spot stimulation that comes with penetration. Therefore, there's a myriad of vibrators made for such internal use, and the selection caters to beginners, advanced users, and everyone in between.

The Best Dual Stimulation Vibrators on Amazon

When it comes to stimulating the clitoris and the G-spot, there's really no need to choose just one. Below, the best rabbit vibrators on Amazon for dual (and even triple!) stimulation that'll knock your sexual socks off.

The Best Anal Vibrators on Amazon

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Still, vibrators tend to fall into a few basic categories. Once you know what each one is and how to use each type of vibrator, you'll be more empowered to make the best decisions for yourself and/or your partner on your next sex toy shopping spree. Below, check out our expert-vetted explainer on each type of vibrator, so you'll be ready for your most well-informed (and most fun) vibrator experience yet.

The Wand Vibrator

Wand vibrators (also known as personal massagers) are among the most popular and recognizable sex toys of all time. In the words of sexologist and intimacy coach Marla Renee Stewart, this toy has a head with "a dome-like shape" that offers "a deep and strong vibration." Indeed, these vibrators can also double as massagers for erogenous zones or simply for tired or achy parts of the body.

When it comes to how to use them, Stewart says, "You always need to read the directions for whatever wand vibrator that you have, as many of them have different speeds and modes and even attachments. Some of them are rechargeable and some are battery-operated or plug-in, so make sure that you follow the directions according to the company. Typically wands are used on the clitoris, but there are attachments that can be used for penetration. If you are using it on your clitoris and you are a squirter, it's highly recommended that you use a waterproof wand because you don't want to cause the wand any damage from fluid, which could void any warranty you have."

The Bullet Vibrator

"A bullet vibrator is a small, handheld, typically cylindrical, sex toy that can be used for direct, pinpointed stimulation on the body," says Frye-Nekrasova. For this reason, they're excellent for both beginners exploring where they most like to be touched as well as experienced users who know exactly where they want their vibrator to stimulate them. Bullet vibrators are also excellent for stimulating other erogenous zones—something we explore in our guide on how to use them.

The G-Spot Vibrator

For people who enjoy vaginal penetration and the novel sensations of a vibrating toy, a G-spot vibrator is the way to go. Frye-Nekrasova defines these vibrators as "insertable vibrator[s] that [are] designed to stimulate the g-spot," which can be accomplished by thrusting the toy in and out of the vagina or grinding against it after insertion.

But what is the g-spot, exactly? AASECT Certified Sex Therapist Shamyra Howard explains, "The g-spot is said to be a sensitive area located at least two to three inches inside the vagina. One way to stimulate the area is by using a finger in the 'come here' motion." This mode of stimulation has inspired the distinctive shapes behind some of the best g-spot vibrator designs.

The Rabbit Vibrator

Are you a fan of both clitoral and g-spot stimulation? Then consider the widely beloved rabbit vibrator. "A rabbit vibrator is a classic sex toy that originally was designed with a long insertable portion for the vaginal canal and an outer clitoral stimulation portion that looked like bunny ears," says Frye-Nekrasova. "Over the decades the designs have changed where some rabbits now don't have the traditional bunny ears, but they still have the dual stimulation with an insertable portion and an outer portion that touches the clitoris."

In recent years, a variety of rabbit vibrators have also been designed for long-distance play, partner play, and solo masturbation.

The Clitoral Suction Vibrator

"Some clitoral stimulators are described as 'suction vibes,'" says author and sexologist Dr. Jess O'Reilly, but she points out that many of these toys don't actually suck on the clitoris. "Instead, they’re surrounding the head of the clitoris to create a suction-like sensation."

These toys are particularly appealing to people who enjoy oral sex or prefer clitoral stimulation that's gentler than the type provided by a wand or bullet vibrator. With a clitoral suction vibrator, Dr. O'Reilly says, a "unique pleasure massage is created by tiny changes in air pressure that surround the head of the clitoris — providing indirect stimulation that tends to create deeper sensations of pleasure and orgasm."

The Remote Vibrator

Dr. Laurie Mintz, a tenured Professor of the Psychology of Human Sexuality, says that this type of vibrator "can be controlled remotely," meaning that you don't need to press any buttons on the actual toy in order to get it to work. 

"There are generally three types of these toys," Dr. Mintz tells us. The first is "those that are controlled with a separate remote, within a certain radius (kind of like remote-controlled cars you may have had or seen when a kid)." 

The second type of remote vibrator allows you or a partner to control the settings and switch between modes by using a mobile application, but, again, "within a specific radius."

Finally, the third type of remote vibrator "can be controlled locally via Bluetooth connection or remotely from anywhere with an internet connection," Dr. Mintz says. "These are terrific for long-distance relationships, yet there is a caution associated with them, and that is that it’s important to choose a toy with proper security and anonymization to avoid being vulnerable to the image of you being exposed."

For that reason, check out our comprehensive list of the best remote vibrators, which have been vetted so you can have fun without worrying about any invasions of privacy.

The Vibrating Panty

In the mood for some clandestine fun? Then consider vibrating panties. Frye-Nekrasova says, "Vibrating panties are vibrators design to sit in the underwear and stimulate the clitoris. They can come with a specific panty or be designed to fit into any and all panties. You use them by placing them in the portion of the panties that sits against the clitoris or other parts of the vulva you want to stimulate and you can control the functions with the remote that comes with the panties or the vibe." 

Just be sure, when you buy, that you test out the toys before wearing and using them in public. No one wants to find themselves accidentally reenacting that notorious scene from When Harry Met Sally.

The Anal Vibrator

Frye-Nekrasova tells us that, in the simplest of terms, "anal vibrators are anal toys that vibrate." As examples, she lists "anal beads that vibrate, vibrating butt plugs and prostate massagers."

Our experts remind us, though, to be sure to only use sex toys that are specifically marked as and made for anal use. Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, a LELO Sexpert and NYU Professor of Human Sexuality, explains that anal vibrators "are typically shaped differently to fit the anatomy of the rectum rather than the clitoris and vagina, and they typically have a tapered end so they don't get lost inside the rectum (something that's not of concern with clitoral and vaginal vibrators)."

Furthermore, she reminds us to "apply plenty of lube that's compatible with the material of the vibrator." For clarification on how to find the right lube that's compatible with the material your anal toys are made of, check out our guide to the best lubes.

Finally, when it comes to anal stimulation, remember that slow and steady wins the race. "Go slow," says Dr. Vrangalova. "Build it up slowly and gently, going from a finger or a thin vibrator to a larger one as the sphincter relaxes." Plus, to avoid embarrassing and/or messy situations, she advises taking precautions.

"Go to the bathroom a couple of hours before anal play. Make sure you don't feel like you have to go right before you're about to play," she says, adding, "Clean out your anus with soap and water. You could do an enema, although it's not really necessary unless you're planning on stuffing really big vibrators in there. Don't eat spicy or otherwise diarrhea-inducing types of meals the night before."

For more specific tips on how to use an anal vibrator, take a look at our comprehensive guide on how to use every type of vibrator as well as our round-up of the best anal vibrators you can buy online.

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

"All anuses have a huge amount of nerve endings concentrated in that area," says Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, a professor of Human Sexuality at NYU and sexpert for sexual wellness brand LELO, "which when stimulated can feel good to people."

Indeed, it's perfectly normal to be curious and/or enthusiastic about anal stimulation. However, because the rectum is physiologically different from the vagina in a number of ways, its' important to properly educate oneself and prepare before delving into this new world of pleasure.

"When it comes to anal stimulation, it’s always important to only use vibrators specifically designed for anal stimulation," says Shamyra Howard, an AASECT-certified sex therapist. "Anal vibrators will always have a flared base to prevent them from getting lost in the anus." Unlike the vagina, the rectum essentially behaves like a vacuum, so if your toys don't have flared bases, the rectum could suck them up into the body.

Furthermore, the rectum does not self-lubricate in the way that the vagina does, so it's important to use lube when inserting a finger, penis, or toy into the rectum. And remember: Start slow! If you're new to anal penetration and are looking to experiment with toys in particular, Dr. Vrangalova recommends starting small, like an anal plug. Plus, she adds, "If people want to start with something even smaller, they can find a set of vibrating anal beads, or vibrating anal butt plugs. "

Finally, remember to always clean your sex toys after each use, and to never use a toy on your clitoris or vagina after inserting it into your rectum. "Most anal vibrators can be cleaned with antibacterial soap and warm water," Dr. Vrangalova explains. "Make sure you wash it thoroughly. Then let it air dry and put it in a clean Ziplock bag. You can also use a sex toy cleaner." Her favorite, she says is this one.

Once you know the ropes about fun (and safe) anal stimulation, it's time to do some vibrator shopping. Scroll on to check out the best anal vibrators across the web, from anal beads to beginners' butt plugs to double- and triple-stimulating toys. No matter your experience level, gender, or preference, there's something here for everyone.

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The Best Anal Vibrators

• Best Anal Vibrator for Beginners: Rocks Off Teazer Petite Sensations Beginner's Vibrating Butt Plug
• Best Anal Vibrator for Experienced Users: Lovehoney High Roller Remote Control Rotating Prostate Massager
• Best Anal Vibrator for Partner Play: LELO Hugo SenseMotion Remote Control Rechargeable Prostate Massager

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Sex educator Javay Frye-Nekrasova defines bullet vibrators as "small, handheld, typically cylindrical" toys, and says that they can be used "for direct, pinpointed stimulation on the body." These toys can therefore be used on the nipples, clitoris, and other external erogenous zones as a means of foreplay, partner play, or solo masturbation. 

And why are they called bullet vibrators? Angie Rowntree, founder and director of the ethical feminist porn site Sssh.com, says these toys owe their name to their "scaled-back size and shape," which can also result in them being called egg or lipstick vibrators.

Below, we've rounded up the all-time greatest bullet vibrators from across the internet, so that sex toy novices and advanced users alike can enjoy this gadget's unique, pinpointed stimulation. And if you're still curious about how to use a bullet vibrator or need ideas on how to safely get creative, check out our handy guide on how to use every kind of vibrator.

Deals on Bullet Vibrators

The Best Bullet Vibrators

• Best Bullet Vibrator for Beginners: Dame Zee Bullet Vibrator
• Best Subtle Bullet Vibrator: Crave Vesper Bullet Vibrator Necklace
• Best Bullet Vibrator for Experienced Users: Lovers Ruby Bullet Vibrator
• Best Bullet Vibrator for Sensitive Clitorises: Bloomi Massage Clitoral and Body Vibrator
• Best Bullet Vibrator Overall: Honey Birdette Bullet

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Nowadays, there are scores of magic wand vibrators on the market that incorporate new technologies, speeds, and state-of-the-art features. But how do you identify a magic wand, and what is it used for?

Lovehoney sexpert Javay Frye-Nekrasova describes a wand vibrator as having a long stem with a round head—but notes that it does not have a phallic appearance. Marla Renee Stewart, MA, a sexologist and sexpert for Lovers, adds that the rounded head of the vibrator is meant to deliver powerful vibrations to the clitoris or other external erogenous zones. Therefore, she says, "A wand vibrator is good for someone who likes deep, guttural vibrations."

"I would not recommend for someone who has a sensitive clitoris, as the vibrations of the wand are typically powerful and fast-moving," she continues, "And if you don't like it on or around your clitoris, you can use it for your muscles and everyday pain."

For more guidance on how to safely use a wand vibrator, check out our guide on how to use a vibrator, which includes a section on wand vibrator use specifically. But if you're already interested in exploring wand-pleasure, check out the all-time best, sexpert- and customer-approved wands below! After all, in the words of Marla Renee Stewart, "The best way to know if a wand is good for you is to try one and see!"

The Best Wand Vibrators

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

For those who are new to the remote vibrator world, these products are state-of-the-art toys that can be controlled via a remote control or mobile application so that you don't need to press any buttons on the toy itself. They're excellent for people who have trouble with mobility as well as for couples, long-distance partner play, and people who just plain hate reaching around down there.

And no matter what type of pleasure you prefer, sex educator and Lovehoney sexpert Javay Frye-Nekrasova assures us that there's something for everyone. "Remote vibrators come in a variety of designs from clitoral stimulators to dual stimulation couples' toys to anal toys," she says. 

And what are the advantages of using a remote vibrator as opposed to a manual one? For one, they make solo play easier and more accessible for people who are injured, have disabilities, can't reach certain spots, enjoy clandestine pleasure from toys like vibrating panties, or simply become tired after long-term repetitive movement. If you're interested in guidance on how, logistically, to use a remote vibrator, check out our handy guide on how to use a vibrator.

For those interested in partner play, remote vibrators also have the capacity to enhance intimacy. Dr. Laurie Mintz, a therapist and sexpert, tells us, "Research shows that couples who engage in novel activities together have more satisfaction and enhanced relationship quality. A remote vibrator can be such a novel activity," she says, pointing out that partners who try new experiences together can enjoy deepened "intimacy, closeness, and satisfaction."

Plus, the new sensations of remote vibrators can help get you out of a sexual rut. "We often get used to the same stimulation for orgasm (e.g., I do this, you do that) and while it can be reliable, it can also get mundane," says Dr. Mintz. "A remote vibrator can introduce you to new sensations and break up that monotony, even if you don’t orgasm (e.g., the sensations don’t hit the mark). Additionally, for many people the idea of handing over control to their (trusted) partner is exciting. Of course, like any sexual activities that entail handing over control (e.g., BDSM), it’s important to establish boundaries and even a clear word that signals you want the person to stop what they are doing."

Another advantage of using remote vibrators? A feeling of playfulness. Dr. Jess O'Reilly, a sexologist for Lovehoney, points out, "Not only does a remote control vibe allow you to weave eroticism throughout your day, but it often inspires you to flirt, tease, build anticipation and be more creative. Playfulness helps to break up the mundanity of routine and stress of real life—rather than just talking about your work, family and schedules, you find new conversations to explore when you inject playfulness into your routine. Couples who are playful have happier relationships and it pays off in the bedroom in terms of openness, exploration and a willingness to experiment and take risks."

So, what are you waiting for? Scroll on to see the all-time best remote vibrators for every sexual preference, whether you're engaging in solo play, exploring, or spicing up a relationship.

The Best Remote Vibrators

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Not sure when would be the best time to break out the vibrating panty? These toys are known for the role they can play in turning up the temperature within a sexual relationship by introducing elements of surprise and mild exhibitionism. This can be valuable in a committed, long term relationship that needs a bit of spicing up or simply between partners (serious or not) who enjoy a bit of adventure. Indeed, sexologist and sexpert Dr. Jess O'Reilly says that introducing sex toys such as vibrating panties "can enhance all sexual relationships―with yourself and with a partner," explaining that "the mere presence of a sex toy often leads to new conversations about everything from desires and fantasies to boundaries and hesitations."

No partner? No problem. Sex educator and Lovehoney sexpert Javay Frye-Nekrasova argues that vibrating panties can be valuable tools in mixing up your masturbation routine.

"Vibrating panties aren't just for partner play," she says. "You can use them for a solo, hands-free masturbation session. You can have the vibrator in your panties and use it while grinding or humping another surface for added stimulation."

So, without further ado, check out the best vibrating panties on the market for both internal and external stimulation. And if you need more insight on how to make the best of your vibrating panty purchases, check out our guide on how to use every kind of vibrator.

The Best Vibrating Panties

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Let's start with the basics: Certified sex educator Javay Frye-Nekrasova defines a vibrator as "a motorized sex toy that can used on the body, typically for sexual stimulation, by offering vibration or other forms of stimulation." These vibrations can often be adjusted to different speeds, patterns, and levels of intensity. Other forms of stimulation also include suction (often incorporated into clitoral stimulation toys) and bursts of air. 

LELO sexpert and NYU professor of Human Sexuality Dr. Zhana Vrangalova says that these sensations feel so good because "our genital areas contain a large number of nerve endings that are quite sensitive to different types of touch." Furthermore, she explains, "Vibrating sex toys are basically motors that run at different frequencies (low to high), creating a unique form of stimulation that can't really be replicated with other implements (like hands, mouths, genitals etc.)." 

And because people like to be touched in varying ways and spots, there are a number of different sex toys on the market employing unique shapes, forms of stimulation, technologies, and techniques. Below, we consult sexperts, sex educators, and more to unpack how to use each type of vibrator, 

Finding the Right Vibrator

If you're not sure which type of vibrator is right for you, Dr. Vrangalova suggests, "Ask yourself what kind of stimulation you enjoy with other implements (hands, mouths, penises etc) and how you masturbate. Do you stick to clitoral stimulation only or do you like to have something inside your vagina as well as on your clit? Do you like outside anal stimulation? Do you like things inside your vagina and/or anus?"

So long as you're not hurting anyone, there is no right or wrong way to desire or experience pleasure, she reminds us.  Founder & Director of ethical feminist porn site Sssh.com Angie Rowntree agrees, elaborating, "For some women, clitoral stimulation is the “tried and true” way for them to experience orgasm–because that’s just how their body is. It’s totally normal and ok if you cannot orgasm from penetrative sex alone, or actually prefer clitoral stimulation to penetration. By contrast, some women experience such an intense degree of clitoral sensitivity that they would prefer internal stimulation with occasional manual strokes of their clitoris—so literally, it’s 'different strokes for different folks!'"

Indeed, the only non-negotiable qualities one should look for in a vibrator are that it's "strong enough to be felt by our nerve endings, and made of a material that are body safe, durable, and easy to clean." Rowntree adds that safety is also paramount. "Don’t skimp on lube," she urges, "and don’t forget to clean up after to ensure hygiene and longevity [of your toy's shelf life]."

How to Use a Wand Vibrator

A wand vibrator is one of the most distinctive-looking and popular vibrators on the market. Frye-Nekrasova describes it as "a vibrator with a long handle and typically a round or oblong shaped head that the vibration is felt through." 

According to sexologist and Lovers sexpert Marla Renee Stewart, MA, a wand is a great choice for those who enjoy non-penetrative stimulation that concentrates instead on their clitoris. It's also fabulous for those who "want a vibrator that is not 'phallic' as such and can also be used to stimulate other external body parts (like teasing your nipples or gently massaging your partner’s back, etc)." She adds that wands "are quite versatile―not to mention intense!"

Frye-Nekrasova also applauds the versatility of the wand vibrator, adding, "You can use them for direct stimulation of genitals; you can use them for body massages around the shoulders and the back; you can use them for any and all erogenous zones, such as the nipples and inner thighs."

How to Use a Bullet Vibrator

According to Frye-Nekrasova, "a bullet vibrator is a small, handheld, typically cylindrical, sex toy that can be used for direct, pinpointed stimulation on the body." To be even more specific, sexologist and sexpert for Lovers Marla Renee Stewart says that this type of vibrator is typically "small in size, less than 2 inches, and typically oval in shape." 

And why is it called a bullet, exactly? Angie Rowntree says that it's precisely because of their traditional elliptical or cylindrical shape. However, she adds, "Nowadays, there are many types of bullet vibrators; some are a bit larger, some made for penetration, and some with attachments, so they've come a long way from the traditional small vibrating oval."

Rowntree goes on to explain that bullet vibrators, unlike G-spot and rabbit vibrators, are designed for external stimulation rather than penetration. "They are designed to provide targeted intense external stimulation," she says. "If holding a bullet vibe directly over your clitoris is too intense, try experimenting with indirect placement (like the top of the clitoral hood) or try holding it horizontally."

And if you're in the mood to get creative, there's a world of stimulating possibilities outside of the bullet's traditional uses. Frye Nekrasova suggests experimenting with using a bullet vibrator on other erogenous zones "such as the clitoris, nipples, perineum, and more for sexual stimulation. They can be used by just holding them directly on the area, rubbing them around the area, or using them over clothes."

Wondering if a bullet vibrator is the right sex toy for you? AASECT Certified sex therapist Shamyra Howard says, "A bullet is often recommended to people who have never used a vibrator before because it’s easily accessible, inexpensive, and provides fantastic clitoral stimulation." Meanwhile, Rowntree adds that this vibrator is a great option for those who are "looking for a toy that’s 'small and mighty' and not too intimidating to beginners, a bullet vibe is a great choice. Bullet vibes allow you to find all your sweet spots and really hone in on them."

Another advantage of bullet vibrators? Their subtlety. Howard points out that "they are immensely portable and discreet if you need to sneak in a quick pleasure break during lunch or pack for travel."

How to Use a Rabbit Vibrator

Rabbit vibrators are among the most popular sex toys on the market, but what are they and what do they have to do with rabbits?

"A rabbit vibrator is a classic sex toy that originally was designed with a long insertable portion for the vaginal canal and an outer clitoral stimulation portion that looked like bunny ears," explains Frye-Nekrasova. "Over the decades the designs have changed where some rabbits now don't have the traditional bunny ears, but they still have the dual stimulation with an insertable portion and an outer portion that touches the clitoris."

In short, a rabbit vibrator is a vibrator that stimulates both the G-spot (internal) and the clitoris (external) at the same time when in use. 

"To use a rabbit vibrator you are going to insert the longer arm of the toy into the vaginal canal (be sure to use lube to ease and enhance the pleasure)," Frye-Nekrasova continues. "You will adjust how deep the insertable portion is so that the outer portion touches the clitoris. Some rabbits are designed so that the insertable portion is adjustable to ensure that it hits the right spots for your body." An adjustable function is also great for those who don't like deep penetration or are still getting used to penetrative play.

But if you're having trouble getting the logistics of this toy right, Stewart says that there are options when it comes to using it. The first, she says, is "to make sure that you put the penetrative piece inside first, start the vibration, and place the other part on the clit and start that vibration." If that doesn't work for you, she says that an alternative is to "use the clitoral piece to stimulate the clit, and then when you're ready, you can put the penetrative piece in and start that one up." Remember, practice makes perfect, and every body is different!

When it comes to safety, though, Rowntree says, "To use a dual action toy safely, lube up and let the swirling shaft tease your vaginal entrance or pleasure you internally while the clitoral stimulator delivers good vibes. Again, this is a toy for both penetration and clitoral stimulation, not designed for body massage or anal play."

And when you choose your lube, remember to pay attention to what it's made of! Stewart points out that most rabbit vibrators are made of silicone, so be sure to avoid silicone-based lubes in order to prevent your toys from degrading.

How to Use a G-Spot Vibrator

The best G-spot vibrators can induce incredible pleasure for women who enjoy penetration, but first it's important to unpack what a G-spot is, how to find it, and how to use a G-spot 

"The G-spot is one of the most talked-about erogenous zones," explains Howard. "Most people want to know where it’s located and how to stimulate it." But this desire brings up the oft-debated question: What is the G-spot, and where is it?

"The G-spot is said to be a sensitive area located at least two to three inches inside the vagina," Howard continues. "One way to stimulate the area is by using a finger in the 'come here' motion. New theories suggest that the G-spot is actually a part of the internal clitoris. Some people report intense orgasms when this area is stimulated."

Not only does this information help when engaging in partner play, but it's also useful in understanding how those of us with vaginas can bring ourselves pleasure. If you're interested in exploring G-spot pleasure, though, the first step is gently exploring your vagina to find where exactly your G-spot is.

"Everyone's G-spot is in a different place, so just because someone says they found it by going 2 inches in and 1 inch up, yours might not necessarily be in that space," Stewart explains. "With that said, once you find your g-spot, then you want to stimulate it by providing pressure with the vibrator while it's vibrating. You can move it around, move it in and out, stimulating the outside of the vaginal canal, too. However, purposeful pressure and stimulation is best coupled with erotic breathing to help you relax and get you the orgasm you desire."

Frye-Nekrasova adds, "To use a G-spot vibrator, you are going to want to apply lube to the toy and then insert it into the vaginal canal. You can insert it and just leave it while it vibrates, or you can also repeatedly thrust the toy in and out while vibrating for added stimulation."

How to Use a Suction Vibrator

Stewart says that she specifically recommends suction toys for beginners. These unique products are designed to mimic oral sex by providing gentle (and often adjustable) suction and sometimes even air pulsations to the clitoris. In addition to more high-end, luxury sex toy options that feel like the real thing, she says that those who are on a budget or are unsure of what they like can " try something like a cheap traveling pulsator to see if you like it."

But what's the best way to use this toy, you ask? "For beginners with vulvas," she says, "I suggest using toys that are appropriate for their clitoral size and shape. Laying on your stomach and using a vibrator or suction toy is a great way to start. Once that feels good to you, then you want to go for the upgraded versions with more bells and whistles, such as the Womanizer Duo, that allows you to feel all the feels through penetration and the air pulse."

How to Use a Remote Vibrator

If you're interested in expanding your sex toy repertoire or if you want a creative way of using sex toys with a partner, consider a remote vibrator. Frye-Nekrasova tells us, "A remote vibrator is a vibrator that is controlled by a remote control, which can be a small handheld remote or app-controlled from a mobile device." Thus, it's worth checking on how the vibrator is controlled before purchasing the product so that you can ensure that it meets your hardware needs (i.e., if you and/or your partner don't have smartphones, you shouldn't get a remote vibrator that's controlled via mobile app). 

The world of remote vibrators is also vast and accommodating. Frye-Nekrasova assures us that "remote vibrators come in a variety of designs from clitoral stimulators to dual stimulation couples' toys to anal toys."

And why opt for a remote vibrator? Howard says that these toys "work really well with a partner controlling the motions. Several app-control vibrators work well on dates and for people in long-distance relationships."

How to Use Vibrating Panties

Vibrating panties are a specific type of remote vibrator that Frye-Nekrasova explains "are designed to sit in the underwear and stimulate the clitoris." She explains, "They can come with a specific panty or be designed to fit into any and all panties. You use them by placing them in the portion of the panties that sits against the clitoris or other parts of the vulva you want to stimulate." From there, she says, you or a partner "can control the functions with the remote that comes with the panties or the vibe."

Dr. Laurie Mintz, Ph.D., who is a sexpert for LELO and author of Becoming Cliterate & A Tired Woman’s Guide to Passionate Sex, further elaborates that some vibrating panties are controlled via mobile app, and that many standalone vibrating panties (standalone meaning that the panties are not included at purchase) employ "a magnet or magnetic wings that attach to your underwear like the wings of some sanitary pads." Other times, she says, vibrating panties can be "integrated, meaning that they come with underwear with a discreet pocket to put the vibrator in. Most target clitoral stimulation, but some can be used for either external or external stimulation."

How to Use an Anal Vibrator

Anal stimulation can be highly pleasurable for people of all genders, but it's important to be prepared before experimenting with your new anal toys―including anal vibrators. 

"The first thing you have to do to use an anal vibrator is get your lube," says Frye-Nekrasova. "The anus is not self-lubricating so you always need lube. The next important step is to anal train to get your anus prepared and ready to anal toys. Once you are comfortable and your sphincters are relaxed you will apply lube to the toys and your anus and slowly insert the toy. When it is in place and comfortable, you can turn on the vibration settings."

If you're unsure about how to anal train, check out some of our favorite anal toys we've compiled, including beginner anal vibrators and trainer kits. 

Frye-Nekrasova also reminds us, "It is important to note that it is not an anal toy if it does not have a flared base. Anal toys have flared bases to make sure they don't go all the way into the rectum and get lost requiring a trip to the ER." Rowntree seconds this point, adding, "If you want to enjoy vaginal penetration, do not use a toy designed for external use only (i.e. wand or bullet), and don’t ever use anal toys in the vagina. If you want to explore 'butt stuff,' definitely be sure to use toys designed for that purpose." Safety is sexy!

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

With that in mind, we've compiled a guide to the best sex toys from across the internet, with attention to the fact that not everyone experiences or seeks pleasure in the same way. We've also tapped doctors, sex toy founders, and sex tech connoisseurs for their advice on all things sex toy, so that you can feel secure in your purchases, engage in fear-free exploration, and have your best sexperience yet. 

The Importance of Masturbation

For me, masturbation is an important part of feminism and female equality. The sexual education in this country too often takes female pleasure completely out of the equation. When I was in middle school, my abstinence-only health teachers failed to teach me and my classmates about the existence of the clitoris or female orgasm. We were also told that sex ends with and only takes place for the express purpose of the male orgasm―a strategy that The Society for Adolescent Health and Medicine says "reinforce[s] gender stereotypes about female passivity and male aggressiveness" and "undermine[s] public health goals and the safe transition of young people into sexually healthy adults."

As a society, when we not only decentralize but erase female pleasure from conversations about sex, many women never realize that sex can and should be enjoyable for them, and they never discover what they do and don't like. And by normalizing sexual encounters that are unpleasant (or just plain boring) for women, we open the door to normalizing coercive and abusive sexual relationships, too.

There are also a number of health benefits associated with sex, masturbation, and female pleasure in general. “Both masturbation and orgasms have a multitude of physical and mental effects on the body that can provide pain relief," says Johanna Rief, Head of Sexual Empowerment at sex toy brand Womanizer. "Both acts release dopamine, reducing stress." She goes on to point out that masturbation even helps with PMS and menstrual discomfort: "The muscle movements during orgasm, alongside the fact that orgasming stimulates your metabolism and blood circulation, minimizes the painful sensations of menstrual cramping.”

Dr. Amanda Olson, pelvic floor specialist and President/Chief Clinical Officer at Intimate Rose, adds that "the process of arousal helps to bring blood flow to the entirety of the muscles and nerves in those areas as well as the lymphatic system, which is really helpful to the overall health of those structures. Bringing in blood flow brings in oxygen and helps with flexibility, pliability, and overall relaxation." The pelvic floor muscles, which provide support beneath important organs like the bladder, vagina, uterus, and rectum, are also strengthened by the contractions comprising the female orgasm, and Dr. Olson says that this pelvic workout helps maintain continence as well as the musculo-skeletal health our spines need for daily activities like "getting in and out of our cars and picking things up without experiencing incontinence or pressure." 

Still not convinced? Dr. Jess O’Reilly, Lovehoney Sexologist & Relationship Expert, adds: "Masturbation, pleasure, and orgasm in particular, also promote more restful sleep—which has its own set of health benefits. Notably, those who rest well have better cardiovascular and mental health, alongside lower blood pressure and stress levels. Pleasure also has the capacity to boost your mood, which can improve cognition, focus and patience (which of course can benefit relationships)."

What to Look For in a Sex Toy

"I always remind people that there are a lot of different ways to wrap a present, and there are a lot of different ways to explore your sexual self," says Dr.Olson.

When you're looking for a sex toy, Cole reminds clients to "go [their] way and remember that there is no 'normal'!" Instead of getting hung up on those preconceived notions about what pleasure should be, she says that, when buying a sex toy, you should ask yourself a few main questions. "Are you going to be using it by yourself or with a partner? Do you want a toy that is internal, external, or both? Answering these questions will help you narrow down which type of toy to look for."

Beyond those basics, she advises to pay close attention to texture and quality. "I always aim for quality over quality. While you can get good quality for $30-50, always buy from reputable companies that provide transparency on materials and manufacturing. Choose a non-porous material like 100 percent silicone, metal, ceramic, glass, or wood. Materials like rubber and jelly can trap unwanted bacteria in pores which can lead to infections like thrush and bacterial vaginosis―all the things you want to avoid. If you would like to try something soft and skin-like, try silicone. Both glass and metal have a solid, smooth feel and are good for temperature play, meaning you can heat or cool them for extra sensation."

The Best Sex Toys for Beginners

Bryony Cole tells first-timers not to complicate things: "If it’s your first toy, my tip for choosing is to start small and start simple!" Below, check out a few of our favorite gentle, simple-yet-versatile toys that are perfect for those who are just beginning to explore the world of sex toys.

The Best Vibrators

Kris Fretz, co-feounder of sex toy brand Emojibator, advises buyers to pay close attention to materials, shape, and texture when purchasing a new vibrator. "The materials and shape of the vibrator are often the most influential factors in how vibrators impact everyone differently," she says. "Personally, I’m more sensitive to the vibrator’s texture vs. intensity, so I look for toys that are made with medical grade silicone so they are safe for bodily insertion. Sometimes a toy can be made with other materials such as metal, and in those cases it’s important to not overuse the toy beyond the recommended usage time and spare your most sensitive areas from burning up!"

And if vibrators are your jam and you're looking for a more comprehensive list of the greatest ones on the market, check out our compilation of the all-time best vibrators, including ones that suit clitoral, g-spot, and anal stimulation, regardless of your experience level.

Best Sex Toys for Vaginal Penetration

While some people vastly prefer the clitoral stimulation that many vibrators provide, others are devotees of penetration and therefore opt for toys like G-spot vibrators and dildos. "Preferences simply vary from one person to another," says Dr. O'Reilly. "Just as some people love oysters and others loathe them, personal tastes are highly varied." If you're concerned about the messiness of penetrative toys, keep in mind our aforementioned clean-up tips, and keep an eye on what your toys are made of, too. "Silicone or borosilicate glass toys are good options, as they can be cleaned easily," Dr. O'Reilly reminds us. "ABS plastic and stainless steel are also good choices. Porous materials (jelly, plastic, rubber, PVC) are harder to clean, so you can always use condoms with these toys for ease of cleanup."

Best Toys for Grinding

Many women prefer to be stimulated by grinding against their hands or inanimate objects like pillows and furniture. This form of masturbation stimulates the clitoris indirectly, which is excellent for those who find direct clitoral stimulation overwhelming or even painful. "When you grind your lips against any object (from a vibrator to a lover’s pelvic bone), you’re likely stimulating the internal bulbs and legs of the clitoris. They’re comprised of erectile tissue―much like the penis, so it makes sense that the rubbing feels pleasurable," explains Dr. O'Reilly.

"Of course, almost any toy can be used 'off-label' for rubbing and grinding," she reminds us, but for an experience specifically catered to al your grinding needs, check out the pieces below.

Best Partner Toys

Sex toys aren't just for solo play, my friends! Dr. O'Reilly points out that "the mere presence of a sex toy often leads to new conversations about everything from desires and fantasies to boundaries and hesitations. These vulnerable conversations have the potential to deepen intimacy and connection. The novelty of a toy can also heighten passion, as it can offer a simple reminder to break your routine and try something new." Check out two A+ toys below, and if they leave you wanting more, take a look at our list of the best toys for partner play.

Best Remote-Controlled Sex Toys

"Using remote-controlled sex toys is a great opportunity to explore eroticism throughout the day regardless of your location (for example, We-Vibe’s toys are app-enabled, meaning that partners can use their toys from any distance)," says Dr. O'Reilly. "They offer novel sensations and inspire playfulness which, in turn, creates stronger relationships because it improves openness and exploration."

Best Anal Toys

According to a 2009 study published by Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health, women who consensually engage in anal sex do so, first and foremost, to pursue pleasure―a point that is often overlooked and under-researched, resulting in what the authors call a "pleasure deficit." As a result, women are often made to feel ashamed for wanting to engage in anal stimulation and aren't sure where to begin.

Check out some of the best anal toys so that you can stimulate your senses, either alone or with a partner. Per Planned Parenthood's advice, though, "The anus doesn’t make enough lubrication on its own for comfortable anal sex, so it’s important to use plenty of lube. Go slowly. Stop if anything hurts and let your partner know how you feel — sex that’s painful or uncomfortable shouldn’t continue." This goes for all sex―solo or with a partner, no matter what part of the body you're focusing on!

Using Sex Toys as a Beginner

Dr. Olson reminds us that using sex toys does not necessarily need to lead up to penetration, sex, or even an orgasm. "Start slow by exploring the tissue in that area, and just gauge how your body responds to touch in a really slow manner, maintaining a nice, easy, steady breathing and pace," she advises. "It’s like being on a walk and thinking about different flowers or animals you notice one day as opposed to another. That thinking can occur with your sexual response, too: Maybe you can explore different types of lubricant and the goal can just be about seeing if you can relax completely, or steady your heartrate, or identify a new type of pressure that feels really good. Or maybe you notice something new today that doesn’t feel as good as it did before."

And for those who are buying a sex toy for the first time, or are overwhelmed by the incredible variety of what's out there, sex toy brand Zumio's Sextech expert, Bryony Cole, urges buyers to turn to authentic client reviews. "Reviews on the product site as well as on Reddit (r/sextoys) help you get a sense of how real people are enjoying the toys you are considering," she says.

How to Clean Your Sex Toys

This is an important and oft-overlooked aspect of using sex toys. If it's going anywhere near your genitals, it should be clean, my friends! Bryony Cole agrees: "Keeping your toys clean is important for toy lifespan (and your health!). Look for organic, water-based anti-bacterial cleaners that will be kind on your body and the sex toy. It’s always good to check your products, as some toy cleaners aren’t suitable. Ideally, opt for mild soap and warm water and you will be set."

Still don't know where to start? Explore options like this cleaning spray formulated specifically for sex toys, or these pH-balanced wipes that can be used on both toys and on your most intimate areas.

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet The Experts

"The Rabbit [went] viral by 1998, when Sex and the City saw Charlotte opting to stay home with her rabbit instead of deal with another bad date," she says. "These days, however, the market for dual action toys has radically expanded your options―and bunny ears are quite optional."

Indeed, rabbit vibrators now come in a variety of different shapes and sizes, and can be used during alone time or for partner play. Many are also more inclusive by offering strap-on and anal rabbit options, so that no matter what your sexuality, identity, or kink preference is, you'll undoubtedly find something that suits you.

Keep scrolling for the best rabbit vibrators according to sex experts and verified user reviews, and check out our guide on how to use a vibrator if you need a refresher on the logistics of it all.

Deals on Rabbit Vibrators 

The Best Rabbit Vibrators

• Best Non-Phallic Rabbit Vibrator: Womanizer Duo
• Best Strap-On Rabbit Vibrator: Lovehoney Double Fun Vibrating Rabbit Double Penetration Strap-On
• Best Adjustable Rabbit Vibrator: Tracy's Dog Bendable Clitoral Sucking Vibrator
• Best Rabbit Vibrator for Female-Female Partner Play: Desire Luxury Rechargeable Strapless Strap-On Dildo Vibrator
• Best Rabbit Vibrator for Clitoral Stimulation: Playboy Pleasure Rapid Rabbit Vibrator
• Best Rabbit Vibrator for Anal Stimulation: Happy Rabbit Triple Vibrator
• Best Rabbit Vibrator Overall: The Lioness Vibrator 2.0

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

But what sets a G-spot vibrator apart from its fellow sex toys?

"A G-spot vibrator is different from other vibrators because its primary focus is to stimulate the G-spot," says Marla Renee Stewart, MA, a sexologist and sexpert for Lovers. "Some use vibration only, while some use thrusting and vibration for stimulation. Trying the different ones helps you to decide which vibrator is best for you."

Angie Rowntree, the founder and director of ethical porn site Sssh.com, adds that this type of vibrator is "designed with a curved shaft to arouse the G-spot in women" and is "close cousins of the dual action vibrators that aim to please your G-spot and clitoris simultaneously [a.k.a. rabbit vibrators]," but is particularly suited to those who enjoy penetration and/or who find the clitoral stimulation too intense.

But what is a G-spot exactly, and how do you find it? And once you find it, how do you know which G-spot toy is right for you? To answer these questions and more, we consulted sexperts, sexologists, and even employed our own personal experience to help you learn everything you need to know about the mysterious G-spot, how to stimulate it, and the best toys on the market for your most satisfying G-spot orgasm yet. For more specific guidance, you can also check out our guide on how to use a vibrator, which includes a section devoted to the G-spot variety.

What is a G-Spot?

The G-spot is the source of countless arguments, discussions, and pop culture phenomena. Some say it's an extension of the clitoris, some say that only certain women have one, and others claim it doesn't exist. The existence of the G-spot vibrator, however, along with the testimony of countless women, leads me to contend that there is, indeed, a G-spot, and it's worth learning about.

"The g-spot, also known as the Gräfenberg spot, was 'discovered' by a German doctor named Ernst Gränfenberg (hence 'g-spot') in 1953," Rowntree tells us. She goes on to explain, "The g-spot is located a few inches inside the front (anterior) vaginal wall. When aroused, it becomes swollen and can lead to intense orgasms and even squirting."

Stewart, on the other hand, says that the g-spot can be known as "the female prostate, the clitoral-urethral-vaginal (CUV) complex, the urethral sponge, and so on," and says that the g-spot is "simply the prostate―the thing that is connected to your bladder and urethra" while simultaneously admitting, "Technically, we could argue that all stimulation is clitoral stimulation because of the clitoris and its external and internal parts."

Confusing? Yes, we know. Female pleasure is unbelievably understudied, and therefore society's understanding of it is largely anecdotal. Stewart admits, "The g-spot can sometimes be contested because it is different on every single body and placed in a different spot on every single body." Rowntree, meanwhile, points out, "Some sexologists, especially the renowned Dr. Ruth, have expressed skepticism about its existence, and are also concerned that the pressure to find the g-spot and orgasm with it can cause performance anxiety that sabotages pleasure."

Indeed, many vagina owners (and their partners) feel like failures if they cannot bring about an orgasm through penetration. In reality, it's completely normal for women to have specific and differing needs when it comes to sexual pleasure, including a preference for clitoral rather than g-spot stimulation.

"There’s a whole world of pleasure points on a woman’s body, so never feel like you are limited," says Rowntree, "Explore what feels right for you and don’t worry about comparing how your body and pleasure works to what works for someone else."

Finding Your G-Spot

But for those who do enjoy penetration (or who think they would), and are curious about finding their g-spot, there's a way of pinning that sweet spot down. Stewart says that this step is essential before finding the perfect G-spot toy for you. 

"Everyone's G-spot is in a different place, so just because someone says they found it by going 2 inches in and 1 inch up, yours might not necessarily be in that space," she says. "With that said, once you find your G-spot, then you want to stimulate it by providing pressure with the vibrator while it's vibrating. You can move it around, move it in and out, stimulating the outside of the vaginal canal, too."

But remember: You won't feel anything if you're not in the mood! Throw on some porn or an erotic film and use some high-quality lube to get in the mood. Stewart also says that "erotic breathing [can] help you relax and get you the orgasm you desire." 

Best Beginner G-Spot Vibrators

"The type of vibrator you want to have is a vibrator that sits well inside of you and is compatible for the type of vagina you have," Stewart advises those who are just beginning their G-spot journeys. This is why the aforementioned self-exploration is so crucial. She explains, "You may have a more shallow vagina or you may have a longer vagina, so finding the perfect fit is necessary if you don't want to waste your time." Below, check out some of our favorite G-spot vibrators for early self-exploration and prime G-spot stimulation.

Best G-Spot Vibrators for the Experienced

If you're a G-spot connoisseur and know exactly how to bring yourself incredible penetrative pleasure, you may be in the market for a more advanced product. The options below employ cutting-edge technology, unique shapes, and novel movements and vibration patterns so you can bring yourself to a whole new world of stimulation. 

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Experts

Plus, if you're nervous about having penetrative sex for the first time, remember that your focus should be on finding a partner who prioritizes your consent, comfort level, and preferences rather than on physically "preparing."

Over the years, that Reddit thread stuck with me. I've been haunted by the idea that people feel compelled to use household objects or unsafe DIY methods to achieve sexual pleasure because of concerns such as privacy and affordability. And, because the sexual education in the United States generally leaves much to be desired, women, in particular, are never advised against these dangerous methods—and are even encouraged to engage in them.

For that reason, I've contacted sexologists, doctors, leaders of sex toy companies, and other experts to unpack why you shouldn't use DIY or household items as sex toys and what you can do instead. No matter what your financial background, household environment, experience level, or other personal needs are, safe and affordable pleasure is always within reach.

Why Homemade Sex Toys Are Dangerous

"In a world where we are encouraged to save money, reduce waste, and to upcycle, I can see why for some the idea of making their own sex toy seems like a good idea," admits Bonny Hall, Global Product director of online sex toy retailer Lovehoney. "However, it really isn't! There is far more to a sex toy than just the shape, and using household objects is definitely a risk that is not worth taking."

Dr. Amanda Olson, a pelvic floor specialist and President & Chief Clinical Officer of Intimate Rose, says that there are several reasons this behavior is risky, the first having to do with materials. "Many materials can cause infection and  injury to the vaginal tissue. When selecting materials many people are unaware of the required safety needs in materials and of their own anatomy," she says, adding that "additionally, looking for safety measures such as FDA-cleared silicone is important."

Hall, who plays a major role in sex toy development, agrees, informing us, "When we are creating sex toys, we are using materials that are body safe, such as silicone, ABS plastics, glass, and aluminum, to name a few. Each of the materials are tested in independent labs and verified for safe use. When you pick up a household object that was not designed to be used intimately, there is a risk that the material is not safe. This is also very relevant if someone chooses to use a food item that can also risk introducing unwanted bacteria into the body."

Indeed, Angie Rowntree, founder and director of ethical porn site Sssh.com, says that "your local Emergency Room staff thanks you in advance" for sticking to medical-grade, body-safe materials rather than experimenting with common-yet-dangerous objects such as "veggies, cellphones, [and] staplers."

Beyond potentially unsafe materials, Dr. Olson adds that when it comes to using food or DIY contraptions as sex toys for penetration, "they may create something that breaks or lodges into the vagina that requires assistance removing." Pieces of vegetable, for instance, may become lodged near the cervix, while hand-carved wooden objects may result in painful, hard-to-reach splinters.

Plus, Dr. Olson warns that "if [you] create something that is too large for [your] vaginal opening," it is possible to "injure [your] pelvic floor muscles or vaginal tissue." Professional, medical-grade sex toys, on the other hand, are constructed in a variety of lengths, girths, and textures, so you can choose a completely body-safe option that suits your preferences and experience level.

Finally, when it comes to anal stimulation, the risks of using a DIY or homemade toy are especially severe. "Our rectum is a vacuum," Marla Renee Stewart, MA, sexologist and sexpert for Lovers, reminds us. So if you use an object or dildo on your rectum that isn't specifically designed for anal penetration, the object "will go in and have a hard time coming out."

Hall says that professionals at Lovehoney call this "the 'prevention of retention' rule," and they spend a great deal of time on it during the research and development stage. "It is about ensuring that all toys can easily and safely be removed from the body," she says. "This is incredibly important for anal play where we ensure our plugs and pleasure toys have strong, flared bases. It is also key for the design of the Kegel and Love Eggs that require a secure and strong pull loop to remove them quickly and easily. Very few household objects will have these elements of design." 

Below, check out a few products that these experts recommend in particular for those who wish to explore new sensations but aren't sure where to begin. And remember to lube up—especially if you're engaging in anal play!

Cost-Effective Sex Toys

Let's face it: Sex toys can be expensive, particularly if they're remote-controlled and/or luxury toys. For that reason alone, it's understandable that one might be tempted to reach for something in their home or their fridge—or to make something themselves—rather than invest. However, keep in mind that medical bills ultimately cost far more than a good sex toy. Plus, your comfort, safety, and health are always worth investing in. 

If you're still concerned about costs, there are also a number of safe, affordable sex toy options out there. Bonny Hall also reassures, "At Lovehoney, we have curated a product range that has something for everybody, at every price point, to ensure that you don't have to resort to the risk of homemade sex toys."

Keep scrolling for some of the best budget options.

Sustainable Sex Toys

The environmentally conscious among us may be tempted to use household items as dildos because of concerns about throwing toys away. Indeed, you should throw away your toys if they begin to smell and should avoid using silicone lube with silicone toys, because the lube can cause the toy to break down. However, you can dramatically increase the shelf life of your toy by taking good care of it. Bryony Cole, a sextech expert for toy brand Zumio, advises, "Keeping your toys clean is important for toy lifespan (and your health!). Look for organic, water-based anti-bacterial cleaners that will be kind on your body and the sex toy. It’s always good to check your products, as some toy cleaners aren’t suitable. Ideally, opt for mild soap and warm water and you will be set."

Plus, there are a number of glass and metal sex toy options that don't break down over time and have a longer lifespan than their silicone counterparts. Below, check out some of our favorite sex toy cleaners as well as glass and metal sex toys so you can look out for your pleasure and the environment at the same time.

Subtle Sex Toys

Many people feel nervous about ordering sex toys because they live with their families of with neighbors or roommates who would judge them for using sex toys. Living situations like thse understandably intensify the urge to use a household object as a sex toy, but Dr. Olson reminds us that doing so, as aforementioned, can cause, "infection of the tissue, injury to the cervix [and] possible injury to the external anatomy (vulva) or the vaginal tissue itself."

If you're nervous about having an unwanted, uncomfortable conversation upon ordering a sex toy, look into brands like Lovehoney and Babeland, which use unassuming boxes and return addresses when they send their products. You can also invest in subtle sex toys that don't look like toys at all, including the ones below.

Creative Sex Toys

Many people have strong creative urges, and sometimes one's creative urges align with their sexual ones. However, certified sex educator Javay Frye-Nekrasova reminds us, "There is a lot of research and education that would need to be done about toy materials to make sure you are creating a body-safe dildo [or any sex toy], so if you don't want to essentially become a chemist and engineer you can purchase a product made to allow you to create dildos at home."

These safe DIY products include penis casting kits, which Angie Rowntree adds is "definitely a fun date night and very simple to use, and the result is a body-safe silicone dildo that can even be tricked out with vibration if you want. Additionally, they make this kit in a variety of skin tones, or even fun 'glow in the dark' blues or greens."

A number of brands also allow you to customize your sex toy via colors and add-ons before you order it, so you can have customized, creative experience without hurting yourself in the process.

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

First and foremost, Frye-Nekrasova explains that "a luxury sex toy is a high-end sex toy that lasts a long time and typically offers great pleasure. What makes a sex toy luxurious is the materials used to create it." But this doesn't mean that your sex toys need to be solid gold or diamond-encrusted to be considered luxurious. In fact, she says, "Luxury sex toys tend to be made of the best materials for the body, such as medical-grade silicone." 

Futhermore, a sex toy might be considered luxurious if it features unique or complex technology. Frye-Nekrasova adds that luxury options "usually have more power if they vibrate or have other motorized functions, like dual motors and capabilities to control them separately."

And what about the world of intricate fantasy dildos and 18 karat gold cock rings that cost the same as a year of university tuition? "Some luxury sex toys are just for show," explains Frye-Nekrasova, "meaning they are impractical or not safe or pleasurable, it's more so about the look rather than what it can do."

If you're planning on incorporating a luxury sex toy into your pleasure repertoire—whether it be for solo time or for partner play—read on for our expert tips and picks for the best luxury sex toys money can buy.

Why a Luxury Toy?

Why buy a luxury sex toy when you can settle for a cheaper option? In my opinion, you should never settle if you can help it—especially when it comes to buying an item that will be touching such sensitive parts of your body—and Frye-Nekrasova agrees. "Someone would buy a luxury sex toy for various reasons," she says, such as "to spoil themselves, [or] because they want something that is good for their body— something that will last a long time or a toy that does more than just the basic vibration."

She goes on to emphasize the quality of the materials and features on luxury options. "Luxury sex toys are absolutely worth it because they are made with better materials and last longer than something you may get cheaper," she points out. "They also tend to have more features that you explore different stimulations to find what you truly enjoy and find pleasurable."

And while she admits that when it comes to choosing between luxury or budget options, "the biggest difference is going to be the price point," she argues that, "Luxury costs, but in the end it is worth it because higher price point products tend to have a much longer life, regardless of if they are used every day, multiple times a day, for hours on end." Thus, if you're looking for your new go-to sex toy and enjoy using toys every day or even a few times a week, a luxury option might be your best bet.

Finding a Luxury Sex Toy

Worried that you won't be able to find the luxury sex toy options? Frye-Nekrasova reassures us that the shopping experience for luxury toys "is not really different" from shopping for any other toy, "in the sense that sex shops carry luxury products just as they do non-luxury products." It's not necessarily about finding a specialty sex shop—it's about looking for toys made from safe, high-quality materials, that feature a variety of customizable functions, and/or that are durable, waterproof, and long-lasting.

Best Luxury Vibrators

The vibrator is one of the most popular types of sex toys of all time, so why not make the experience lavish? These options come with a variety of unique settings, vibration patterns, and other features that are bound to bring your sexploration to the next level. Just be sure you know how to use a vibrator safely and effectively before you embark on your luxurious pleasure journey.

Best Luxury Dildos

Dildos are brilliant for those who enjoy penetration, but these toys have advanced far beyond the traditional, simple phallus shape. Dildos come in all shapes and sizes, can be made from a variety of different body-safe materials, and incorporate exciting, unique technologies. Check out our favorite luxury options below, along with our experts' tips on how to use a dildo.

Best Luxury Toys for Penis Play

Whether you're a person with a penis or your partner is, never fear—there are a number of sex toys made for your pleasure, whether you're interested in solo or partner play.

Best Luxury Toys for Partner Play

Sex toys aren't just meant for solo masturbation. There's a whole world of sex toys for partner play that can enhance emotional and physical intimacy, spice up your sexual routine, and even help you get to know new a partner. And, if you're going to introduce a new toy to your boo, why not show off with an ultra-luxe pick (or two)? 

Best Luxury Anal Toys

Your rectum is one of the most sensitive parts of your body, so when you're looking for the best anal toys, why not indulge in a luxury option? And while you're shopping, remember to always, always use plenty of lube when engaging in anal play! The rectum, unlike the vagina, is not self-lubricating, so if you want to have your safest, sexiest anal session(s) yet, you're going to need it. 

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

Meet the Expert

Angie Rowntree, founder and director of ethical porn site Sssh.com, says that while many dildos are phallic and designed to look like penises, "dildos ultimately come in many different shapes and sizes, and some can be more 'abstract' or even fantastical looking. They can be made of different materials, and they can also be slightly curved, to help stimulate your g-spot or prostate."

We've already scoured the internet for the very best dildos on the market today, but if you're wondering, on a more fundamental level, how to use a dildo—or even how to up your dildo-play game—you've come to the right place. Keep scrolling for some of the best, expert-approved tips on how to properly use a dildo, alone or with a partner. Once you have the right tools in hand, the possibilities are truly endless. 

Buying a Dildo

Buying a dildo can be an incredibly daunting experience, what with all of the shapes, materials, and kinks that buyers can fall into a rabbit hole looking into during their shopping experience. For that reason, we've asked experts to demystify the dildo shopping experience so that when you're browsing online or at your local sex shop, you can do so with the utmost confidence.

Rowntree points out that, first and foremost, you should "make sure your toy is made from quality materials and designed for penetration." You should never assume that an object is safe to insert into your body unless the package or instructions expressly says so. 

Then, when it comes to materials, Lovehoney sex educator Javay Frye Nekrasova breaks it down, explaining that "there are really four main material types for dildos: Silicone, metal, glass, and plastic. It is recommended to stick to non-porous materials, as they are easier to clean, so your glass and metal are top choices, followed by silicone, and then plastic."

Choosing a dildo based on material can also vary based on your wants and needs. She adds that "choosing the right material will also depend on how you plan on using the dildo. If you are going for anal use more flexibility is recommended so silicone and plastic are better options for this. For vaginal use, any material could work, depending on what you personally enjoy and are looking for. Direct, pinpointed stimulation can be achieved with metal, as they generally are designed to offer that focus on the g-spot. Glass dildos are great for people looking for multiple forms of stimulation like from the design and additions...If you want something that feels more like having a partner than realistic dildos, silicone or plastic are the way to go."

And if you're worried about sizing? Sexologist Marla Renee Stewart, MA, a designated sexpert for Lovers, says to start small, noting that the size of a dildo "is really dependent on peoples' penetration experiences. So if you're not used to dildos, whether vaginal or anal, trying smaller sizes might be best."

"It can seem overwhelming," Frye-Nekrasova says, aware of all these circumstances that go into picking a toy, "but at the end of the day, it is all just a matter of going for what you enjoy. So start by paying attention to what you actually find pleasurable and then pick your dildo to meet those aspects you already enjoy." Remember: Sex is supposed to be fun!

How to Safely Use a Dildo

Dildos come in remarkably long, girthy sizes, but don't feel like you need to measure up to the six-, ten-, and 12-inch options out there. Keep in mind that the average length of an erect penis is about five inches, so, even if you're sexually active, it is absolutely normal for you to be overwhelmed and even physically incapable of handling the entirety of an eight-inch dildo. For optimal comfort, start small and pay attention to sizing when you buy your sex toys. 

And, if you're determined to take on the larger dildos of the world, Frye-Nekrasova has you covered. "To ensure you are comfortable using a dildo, take your time," she advises. "You don't have to shove the entire length of the dildo inside of you—you can work your way up. Do what you feel comfortable with."

How to Clean a Dildo

It's easy to overlook sex toy care, but properly cleaning your sex toys will help them last longer and, most importantly, keep you safe from bacterial infections. Frye-Nekrasova even refers to cleaning as the very first tenet of sex toy safety, specifically stating that "washing with a toy cleaner or unscented mild soap is how you should clean all toys."

Furthermore, she adds that sex toys are not communal items, telling us that dildos should never be shared and that "you should not use the same toys between partners. Buy a new dildo for every relationship, and get different colors for you and your partner(s) to ensure you are using yours."

Using Lube With a Dildo

Lube is an underrated product that belongs in everyone's sexual toolkit for its ability to both ease penetrative sex and enhance pleasure. Frye-Nekrasova echoes this point, calling lube "crucial" and pointing out that, in addition to increasing pleasure, using lube "help[s] to minimize the chances of tears or fissures."

Rowntree agrees, adding, "Even if you get plenty aroused, lube can create a new and wonderful sensation and reduce friction and lube is absolutely non-negotiable if you are exploring anal play."

However, it's important to pair your lubricants with your sex toys properly. For instance, she warns that silicone lubes can degrade silicone toys, including dildos, and advises that "if you are worried about it, stick to water-based lube, as it is safe for all toy materials."

Suction Cup Dildos

Many dildos come with suction cups at the base so that you can ride them at your leisure during solo play. These toys, when made from high-quality materials, are extremely convenient, because they can adhere to just about any hard, flat surface, like floors and walls. 

Rowntree advises, "If you do enjoy playing in the shower, and you want to ride solo, or have a hands-free experience, a suction cup dildo can (usually) keep the toy in place while you go to town. As always, use good common sense and caution in case the suction cup should loosen during the course of play. And let’s just say you should definitely avoid putting the suction cup dildo on a door that someone could easily open while you’re in the middle of play time."

Dildos for Anal Stimulation

One might think that vaginal and anal toys are interchangeable, but that's far from the truth. "If you're going to do anal sex," says Stewart, "you'll need a dildo with a wide base because our rectum is a vacuum and it will go in and have a hard time coming out. However, this is not necessary for vaginas because the cervix prevents dildos from going into the uterus."

And if you're a beginner to anal stimulation? Rowntree says that when it comes to anal penetration, it's best to "start smaller and work your way up and stop if you feel any discomfort."

Dildos for Solo Play

Sex toys are treasured in the world of masturbation for a reason: They're great for exploring oneself and discovering one's pleasure preferences. And while you can, of course, go the traditional route by thrusting a dildo in and out of your vagina or anus to simulate partnered pleasure, there are a variety of creative ways to use a dildo that can spice up your self-care routine.

"When masturbating, you can insert the dildo while you read erotica and go at your own pace," recommends Stewart. "You can also use dildos that have suction cups and place it somewhere you can try and control your own penetration. Even placing a dildo in a sex pillow can help facilitate how you like to be penetrated."

Frye-Nekrasova adds, "A creative way to use dildos for masturbation is as a practice tool for oral sex. If oral is an arousing activity for you, then performing oral on a dildo can be a great way to get in the mood for masturbation."

In short, when it comes to masturbation, feel free to use dildos in any way that turns you on, so long as you're safe, comfortable, and prepared.

Dildos for Partner Play

Like all sex toys, dildos can be used for more than just a solo session. Incorporating sex toys into partner play can be a great way of building intimacy and exploring sexual preferences with your partner, and for those who love penetration, dildos are the perfect addition to any partnered sex sesh.

"Let’s just say the erotic imagination is a wonderful and powerful thing," says Rowntree. "You might put on a show for your partner and tease them, pretending that the dildo you’re pleasuring yourself with is their penis or use it as part of an erotic power exchange scene. As long as it’s safe, sane, and consensual, go ahead and listen to what your bodies and minds are calling out for."

Dildos can also be used to gently instruct a partner on how you like to be touched. Try using on yourself in front of your partner as a means of foreplay and saying something like, "I want you to touch me like this." Frye-Nekrasova agrees, saying that dildos are "perfect for explor[ing] new positions."

Plus, incorporating sex toys into the bedroom is a great way of maintaining sexual boundaries within a relationship. Frye-Nekrasova explains, "They are a great option if a partner is not in the mood for sex using their physical body but they still want to provide you pleasure."

Strap-On Dildos

Strap-ons are dildos that attach to the wearer—either by a harness or by a g-spot stimulating attachment that sits inside the vagina—that are used to penetrate the receiver in the vagina or rectum. 

"Strap-ons can seem intimidating, especially since for many people they are only viewed as something used by LGBTQIA+ couples," admits Frye-Nekrasova, "but strapons are for any and everyone. They have so many varied uses. Strap-ons can be used for pegging, double penetration, practicing your stroke game, sexual activity without touching genitals, and so much more. They also come in a variety of different forms, from actual harnesses to underwear to strapless strap-ons."

And if you're sold on strap-ons or simply curious, but unsure of how to broach the topic with your partner? Frye-Nekrasova says, "The first step in getting used to strap-ons is getting good at communication. For most people, while using a strap-on they don't have the dildo anatomically attached to them so they can't fully feel what is happening, so you have to listen to your partner and communicate with them to ensure you are using it in a pleasurable manner."

As with all sex acts, use of a strap-on is based first and foremost on enthusiastic consent, so be sure that both the giver and receiver are comfortable vocalizing their feelings with complete honesty and listening to the other with complete openness.

In terms of logistics, Frye-Nekrasova writer, "The second step is getting the right products. You want a harness that is comfortable for you whether it be a traditional harness, strapless, or underwear harness and then you and your partner need to decide together on the dildo that will be used." There's an incredible amount of variety out there when it comes to strap-ons, so if this is something you and your partner are interested in, there is undoubtedly an option out there for you.

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.

But all of this time, along with the basic nature of the dildo, means that there's been plenty of space for innovation and versatility. Now, dildos come in a huge variety of shapes, sizes, and consistencies, and can be used for partner play, kink, anal play, and more. "Dildos can be made from different types of materials, including silicone, glass, stainless steel, wood, etc," notes Marla Renee Stewart, MA, a sexologist and sexpert for Lovers.  "In addition, they can vary in how they are shaped. They can be made for shorter penetration, longer penetration, or even curved to aim towards the g-spot."

This means that if you're interested in using a dildo, the possibilities are endless: There's no one-size-fits-all toy, and exploring different options will help you find what's comfortable and pleasurable for you. Lovehoney sex educator and pleasure expert Javay Frye-Nekrasova encourages people to look into the many different kinds of toys out there in order to discover what they like best. "If you know that you enjoy penetration and the fullness feeling of being penetrated," she says, "you can just explore different-sized dildos to find the one for you."

Still, while all of this is fantastic news for sex toy enthusiasts, it also means that there is a daunting number of options out there that can easily overwhelm the casual dildo shopper or the sex toy beginner. With that in mind, we've consulted sex educators, therapists, and other experts about all things dildo so that you can go into your shopping experience educated, prepared, and excited about all the pleasure possibilities before you.

Finding the Right Dildo

On a basic level, Javay Frye-Nekrasova defines a dildo as "an insertable toy used for penetration. it can be used for vaginal, oral, or anal penetration. They can vary in terms of shape and design, but generally 'dildo' is used to describe penis-like insertable toys." Therefore, she says, "The first step in knowing if a dildo is a good fit for you is determining how you feel about penetration. If you don't particularly enjoy penetration then a dildo might not be the best for you."

But not all dildos are made alike, of course. Marla Renee Stewart recommends that, when shopping for the best dildos, users keep in mind the kind of stimulation they like and the sorts of sex acts they'd like to use the toy for. Below, we've looked into the best dildos for various types of penetration and experience levels. We've also kept quality in mind, settling for no less than the best, safest dildos around (and yes, homemade sex toys are always a bad idea).

Stewart echoes our concern, advising, "Make sure that you use a quality dildo with body-safe material. Because sex toys are not regulated, it's easy to get a dildo that is toxic, so make sure that you look at the products and what they are made out of." She also reminds us to use lube when engaging in dildo play in order to "make penetration easier and avoid many micro-tears."

In terms of material, both Stewart and Rowntree say to buy from reputable sex toy shops and to ensure that the toys are, according to Rowntree, "body safe and designed for the purpose of penetration. If in doubt, ask the manufacturer." These materials can include body-safe glass, latex, wood, silicone, or metal, though Stewart says, "Silicone is the only material that is a little bendable, so if you want something really hard, then using any other type of material should be good. If you like a little give, silicone is great for that." 

Best Dildos for Beginners

As with all things sex (and life), when it comes to dildos, there's no need to bite off more than you can chew. Frye Nekrasova advises, "It is best to start with a smaller girth and work your way up," suggesting items that are on the conservative side in terms of length and girth.